REWIND National Treasure

[00:00:00] Get ready for a treasure trove of nostalgia and hilarious anecdotes as we rewind and revisit the iconic 2004 adventure film, National Treasure.

[00:00:21] Welcome to the No More Late Fees podcast. I'm Danielle.

[00:00:24] And I'm Jackie. And we're just two best friends and ex-Blockbuster employees re-watching some of the best and worst movies from the late 90s and early 2000s.

[00:00:33] This week, we are headed on a treasure hunt with the 2004 movie, National Treasure.

[00:00:39] But before we get started, we have some...

[00:00:44] Housekeeping!

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[00:01:20] And we're excited to have our pod pal from the Totally Rag Christmas podcast, Jerry, join us on this adventure.

[00:01:27] Welcome, Jerry.

[00:01:28] Hey! Thank you for having me.

[00:01:32] I'll give myself an applause there.

[00:01:38] We are super excited to, one, take you out of the 80s today.

[00:01:43] And two, we're in spring, not Christmas time, so you're really going to have a blast.

[00:01:49] Yes!

[00:01:50] That's fun! Yeah, let's do it.

[00:01:52] So National Treasure is a 2004 American action-adventure film released by Walt Disney Pictures and produced by Jerry Breckheimer.

[00:02:00] The movie follows historian and codebreaker Ben Gates, played by Nicolas Cage.

[00:02:05] He's been searching his whole life for a rumored treasure dating back to the creation of the United States.

[00:02:11] Joining his expedition is fellow treasure hunter Ian Howe, played by Sean Bean,

[00:02:16] and kidnapped slash in for the ride Dr. Abigail Chase, an archivist at the National Archives.

[00:02:24] Gates and his crew have to race against the clock, the FBI, and a former colleague to get the treasure of a lifetime.

[00:02:32] We didn't include Riley in that synopsis, and that makes me sad.

[00:02:37] Add him in!

[00:02:39] And don't forget our boy Riley!

[00:02:43] I can add him in.

[00:02:44] And don't forget our boy Riley, who, by the way, is coming back for the National Treasure TV show.

[00:02:51] Yay!

[00:02:52] Yes, I saw that.

[00:02:53] So maybe, just maybe, we might be getting a National Treasure 3, for fuck's sake.

[00:03:00] Thank you.

[00:03:00] I hope so.

[00:03:02] I will watch treasure hunts all day, every day.

[00:03:06] Long overdue.

[00:03:08] So, National Treasure stars Nicholas Cage, Harvey Keitel, John Voight, Diane Kruger, Sean Bean, Justin Bartha, and Christopher Plummer.

[00:03:17] It was written by Marion Wiberly, Cormac Wiberly, Jim Koof, E. Max Fry, Ted Elliott, and Jonathan Hensley.

[00:03:27] And it was directed by John Turtletop.

[00:03:29] And you can watch it on Disney+.

[00:03:32] But before we get started, let's get into our ratings rewind.

[00:03:37] So you know the drill.

[00:03:38] Before we get into the movie, we'll reveal the rating our Y2K versions of ourselves would give.

[00:03:42] Then at the end, we'll see if our current selves agree with our initial rating.

[00:03:46] Our scale consists of, would buy it, would buy it again.

[00:03:49] The best would play on repeat.

[00:03:51] Five-day rental.

[00:03:53] Would watch again.

[00:03:54] Two-day rental.

[00:03:56] Okay, but nothing to write home about.

[00:03:58] Same-day rental.

[00:04:01] Trash.

[00:04:01] Straight-up trash.

[00:04:03] Throw it into the Hudson.

[00:04:08] This is true.

[00:04:10] Jenny, what's your Y2K rating?

[00:04:12] And by the way, at your mama's, I don't give a shit.

[00:04:16] That's what I said.

[00:04:21] Let's see.

[00:04:21] So when I saw it, I remember really digging it.

[00:04:24] I thought it was super cool.

[00:04:25] Different premise.

[00:04:27] I think my Y2K self would, you know, when it first came out, I think it would have been, you know, the best would play on repeat.

[00:04:36] Would buy it.

[00:04:37] Sounds good.

[00:04:38] Would buy it.

[00:04:38] Yeah.

[00:04:39] I definitely would buy, would buy again.

[00:04:41] Yeah.

[00:04:43] We already know what Jackie's is going to be.

[00:04:46] You know I owned it.

[00:04:50] Am I going to make it a trifecta here?

[00:04:53] Well, guess what guys?

[00:04:55] Y2K Danielle loved National Treasure.

[00:04:58] Nice.

[00:04:59] And it would be, it would buy it.

[00:05:02] We're on our way to maybe National Treasure.

[00:05:10] Play pick 2022.

[00:05:12] We'll see.

[00:05:13] We shall see.

[00:05:15] We shall see.

[00:05:17] Let's talk about money, people.

[00:05:19] Because that's what this movie is about, right?

[00:05:21] It is.

[00:05:22] Give me that treasure.

[00:05:23] The budget for this movie was $100 million.

[00:05:29] That's right.

[00:05:29] I said $100 million.

[00:05:32] I don't understand.

[00:05:33] I don't doubt it.

[00:05:34] I don't, where did they spend it?

[00:05:35] I have money.

[00:05:36] I mean, it's a great movie, but like, where did they spend that money?

[00:05:40] I don't get it.

[00:05:41] So if we math in each fake declaration of independence costs $35.99.

[00:05:48] At many, we need for $100 million.

[00:05:51] That's a lot of, that's a lot of declarations.

[00:05:55] Nicolas Cage's toupee got like $5 million.

[00:05:59] Oh my gosh.

[00:06:00] Yeah.

[00:06:00] Oh, yeah.

[00:06:02] I hope he should just get plugs and call it a day.

[00:06:05] Call Steve Carell.

[00:06:06] He knows the deal.

[00:06:08] Exactly.

[00:06:09] Guys, come on.

[00:06:10] I'm going to be right there with you.

[00:06:12] Just, you know.

[00:06:14] Just own it.

[00:06:15] It's okay.

[00:06:16] Just own it, dude.

[00:06:17] Well, you know, it was an investment.

[00:06:19] It was a great investment because-

[00:06:21] It was.

[00:06:21] This movie made $347.5 million worldwide.

[00:06:26] That's a lot of cheese.

[00:06:28] A lot of cheddar.

[00:06:30] It earned $11 million on its opening day in the U.S.

[00:06:34] ahead of the SpongeBob SquarePants movie.

[00:06:37] I'm shocked.

[00:06:38] I'm shook.

[00:06:39] Why was SpongeBob not number one?

[00:06:43] I'm actually surprised.

[00:06:45] Let's not pretend.

[00:06:47] Well, I mean, but what they don't tell you is that all that was really, you know, it earned

[00:06:51] $11 million, but only in Templar gold.

[00:06:54] Exactly.

[00:06:54] Yes.

[00:06:56] You got to convert that to U.S. dollars.

[00:06:59] It did really well.

[00:07:01] I have a bunch of cool factoids to just throw at us.

[00:07:04] The film had its best opening weekend for a Disney film release in November, but it was

[00:07:09] surpassed later by Chicken Little.

[00:07:11] That's surprising.

[00:07:13] I think we sleep on Chicken Little.

[00:07:19] It held the number one spot for three weekends.

[00:07:22] Did you know, so in Japan, National Treasure actually beat out the double-billing Mega Man

[00:07:28] NT Warrior program of light and Dark and Dual Masters Curse of the Death Phoenix, and

[00:07:33] it grossed $11.6 million in its first week.

[00:07:36] Like, that's ridiculous.

[00:07:38] Like, $11.6 million.

[00:07:39] I mean, wow.

[00:07:41] I would marry a man for less, that's for sure.

[00:07:47] Little Raj said that he gave the film two out of four stars.

[00:07:52] Damn.

[00:07:53] Calling it so silly that the Monty Python version could see, could use the same screenplay.

[00:08:01] Line for line.

[00:08:03] There were some lines that I was just like, no, Nick Cage.

[00:08:08] No.

[00:08:11] There's definitely some cringe moments, but I think that's what makes the rest of it so

[00:08:14] good, you know?

[00:08:15] And it's Nicolas Cage, so you just expect it.

[00:08:19] Like, you've just, we've accepted the fact that he's kind of cringy sometimes, and it's

[00:08:24] okay.

[00:08:25] I don't think I've...

[00:08:27] Sorry, Jake.

[00:08:28] No, I was just going to say, it reminds me very much of that episode of Community, where

[00:08:31] Abed watches all those Nick Cage movies.

[00:08:33] Yes!

[00:08:35] And then he, like, just loses it.

[00:08:39] You know, you never know with Nick Cage.

[00:08:40] It's up and down.

[00:08:41] I love Community.

[00:08:43] It's so good.

[00:08:45] Yeah.

[00:08:45] It's just, for me, I don't think I, at the time, I thought Nicolas Cage was weird.

[00:08:50] I just was vibing.

[00:08:52] I was vibing with him.

[00:08:54] But now...

[00:08:55] I don't think we realize till later, in retrospect, and then we're like, were we all drinking

[00:09:02] the same pool aid where we thought Nick Cage was a decent actor?

[00:09:08] Is it because he's a Coppola, like, that we were duped?

[00:09:13] No, I think it's because of leaving Las Vegas.

[00:09:16] Like, that's really the only reason why we thought that, I think.

[00:09:19] I don't know what movie did it for me.

[00:09:22] Well, Moonstruck.

[00:09:23] I'm not going to...

[00:09:24] Moonstruck.

[00:09:25] Oh, yeah, that's true.

[00:09:25] That's a good one, too.

[00:09:26] And Peggy Sue got married.

[00:09:27] Peggy Sue got married.

[00:09:29] Those were the ones that I was like, this dude's cool.

[00:09:31] I like it.

[00:09:32] I watched it, like, all the time because my mom loved it.

[00:09:35] But I don't think he knew he was a nepotism baby at that time.

[00:09:38] I don't think I found out till much later.

[00:09:43] And, yeah.

[00:09:44] He did a good job hiding it.

[00:09:45] There's an actor that he let live with him and not pay, like, rent and helped him get his

[00:09:53] career and get his first movie.

[00:09:56] I don't know if it was Johnny Depp, but it's somebody big.

[00:09:59] My brain said Johnny Depp, so I'm wondering.

[00:10:01] But, I mean, it's probably just because Johnny Depp is in all of our subconscious right now.

[00:10:08] Absolutely.

[00:10:09] I don't know what you're talking about.

[00:10:15] That whole thing is crazy.

[00:10:17] It is.

[00:10:17] And I am living for it.

[00:10:21] Yeah.

[00:10:23] Just, like, even going further back, which I think is interesting, is that Nicolas Cage

[00:10:28] and the director, John Turtletop.

[00:10:31] Turtled?

[00:10:32] Turtletow?

[00:10:32] How do you say it?

[00:10:33] Yeah.

[00:10:33] Turtletop.

[00:10:34] They actually went to high school together.

[00:10:37] They went to Beverly Hills High School in the late 70s.

[00:10:40] And they were in the same drama class.

[00:10:43] Oh, nice.

[00:10:44] Really?

[00:10:44] I think it's interesting.

[00:10:45] So, and then they worked on this movie together.

[00:10:47] And then reunited, I think, for the second movie.

[00:10:54] I wonder if he'd come back for the third one.

[00:10:56] I think he did the second movie.

[00:10:57] I could be wrong.

[00:10:59] But, yeah.

[00:11:00] Imagine being in an acting class with Nicolas Cage.

[00:11:03] No.

[00:11:04] How crazy would that be?

[00:11:06] Overactors Anonymous.

[00:11:08] Right?

[00:11:09] The director actually beat him out for the lead role in their production of Our Town.

[00:11:16] What?

[00:11:17] And Nicolas Cage only had two lines of dialogue in the play.

[00:11:23] So, it was Johnny Depp.

[00:11:25] Oh, look at that.

[00:11:26] Oh, wow.

[00:11:27] Look at us.

[00:11:29] Good job.

[00:11:30] Yes.

[00:11:30] Let's hear a word from our pod pals.

[00:11:37] Hey, it's John Francois.

[00:11:39] Hola, y'all.

[00:11:39] I'm AJ VanderTut.

[00:11:41] And have you ever licked something and thought,

[00:11:44] Mmm, that's delicious.

[00:11:45] Well, that's us.

[00:11:47] We're the Delicious Recap.

[00:11:48] We're putting our tongues on all kinds of media.

[00:11:51] Family Matters.

[00:11:52] We're putting our tongue on nine years worth of content that is sometimes good,

[00:11:57] sometimes not so good.

[00:11:59] But you know what?

[00:11:59] All around, it's childhood lovely goodness that is worth a taste.

[00:12:03] It really is.

[00:12:04] I wonder what a snort would taste like.

[00:12:06] It tastes like mango.

[00:12:07] We're recapping Family Matters from beginning to end.

[00:12:09] I mean, we've done season one.

[00:12:11] We're currently on season two as we're recording this.

[00:12:13] We interview cast and crew from the show.

[00:12:16] We interview like-minded 90s-loving podcasters.

[00:12:19] Come join us, The Delicious Recap, wherever you get your podcasts.

[00:12:26] All right.

[00:12:27] You guys ready to dive in to this wonderful American treasure?

[00:12:31] I'm ready.

[00:12:33] Okay.

[00:12:35] Okay.

[00:12:35] The movie starts out in Washington D in 1974.

[00:12:39] A young Ben Gates is exploring the attic of his, I don't know if, I'm assuming it's grandfather's house.

[00:12:49] Grandpa played by Christopher Plummer, right?

[00:12:53] Yeah.

[00:12:54] Yeah.

[00:12:54] AKA the dad from The Sound of Music.

[00:12:58] Yes.

[00:12:58] Yes.

[00:13:00] He regales him this story of the Freemasons.

[00:13:06] And Charles Carroll was the last living signer of the Declaration of Independence.

[00:13:13] He was very ill.

[00:13:14] And like his coach driver was the great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather of Benjamin Gates.

[00:13:24] And so he told the Freemasons secret because he was on his deathbed.

[00:13:32] And so now this clue has been passed down from generation to generation.

[00:13:38] Apparently no one could figure it out.

[00:13:40] I guess we had to wait for Google.

[00:13:41] That's what I'm assuming.

[00:13:44] I want to call out a few things in this scene alone.

[00:13:48] Okay.

[00:13:49] Uh-oh.

[00:13:50] So now adult Danielle is seeing national treasure.

[00:13:53] And I have to look at this movie in either two ways.

[00:13:57] Either this is bullshit or American history as it's told in this country to look at it as a fairy tale.

[00:14:09] Like it's a fun group of made up stories with a sprinkle of truth.

[00:14:14] With a whole bunch of stuff just taken out to make it look a certain way.

[00:14:20] Because there's groups of people missing.

[00:14:23] There's realities missing.

[00:14:25] So I have to like look at it from that perspective that these are just stories.

[00:14:31] Unfortunately, many people believe them for facts completely.

[00:14:34] And that's what's the problem.

[00:14:36] I thought you were going to chase this conspiracy theory down the rabbit hole.

[00:14:43] So I'm glad we're not going in that direction.

[00:14:45] You look very worried.

[00:14:46] I was.

[00:14:47] I was because I'm like, oh, Danielle's going to go off on Freemasons.

[00:14:53] And oh, no, we don't have the time today.

[00:14:57] If y'all want to see that, go to Patreon.

[00:15:00] I'll do a whole special.

[00:15:02] The Illuminati.

[00:15:04] Yeah.

[00:15:05] Oh, gosh.

[00:15:06] All day.

[00:15:07] No, I just mean like when I was younger, I didn't really know what I know now.

[00:15:12] And now that I know that there's so many people who are missing from our history books and how this movie essentially perpetuates this false narrative of our American history.

[00:15:26] But if I look at it from a fictional standpoint, I'm fine.

[00:15:32] So that's the lens in which you choose to view.

[00:15:35] That's how I'm choosing to look at this movie completely because hashtag national treasure so white.

[00:15:44] That's what.

[00:15:45] And the second thing is eventually we see Ben's dad come in, who's played by that horrible human being John Voight.

[00:15:54] John Voight.

[00:15:54] John Voight.

[00:15:55] Can can we talk about like why couldn't they have made younger actors play them?

[00:16:01] What the fuck is on his head?

[00:16:03] Is that a wig?

[00:16:04] Why he look older than his daddy?

[00:16:08] Tell me he don't look older than his daddy in this scene.

[00:16:12] Yeah, I don't know.

[00:16:14] And he's not older than Christopher Plummer.

[00:16:16] You look bad, Boy.

[00:16:18] Oh, John Voight.

[00:16:20] He looks real bad.

[00:16:21] I was like, you guys could have just had younger actors play these roles.

[00:16:26] This is ridiculous.

[00:16:28] That wig was ridiculous.

[00:16:31] Or the TK.

[00:16:32] It was like damn near lifting off his fucking head.

[00:16:35] Maybe a good chunk of the budget went to the toupees for the men.

[00:16:42] They should have just put them all in powdered wigs at this point.

[00:16:46] If they had a black stylist on there.

[00:16:48] I would have dug it.

[00:16:49] If they had a black stylist.

[00:16:51] A little bit of historical accuracy.

[00:16:53] I mean, if they would have had a black stylist, the wigs have been right.

[00:16:57] Hell yeah.

[00:16:58] A nice lace front.

[00:16:59] Talk to your wig master.

[00:16:59] A nice lace front.

[00:17:01] You wouldn't notice shit.

[00:17:02] It's bad.

[00:17:05] So now we are given the first clue.

[00:17:10] The secret lies with Charlotte.

[00:17:12] Cut to they're in snow.

[00:17:15] I'm assuming it's like near the Arctic.

[00:17:18] Yes.

[00:17:19] They're in Antarctica.

[00:17:21] Or what I like to call places white people like to go.

[00:17:24] Oh, this is true.

[00:17:29] We see Ian, who is kind of the rival of the movie.

[00:17:35] They're frenemies.

[00:17:36] Which is, this is important.

[00:17:38] They're actually business partners.

[00:17:40] Yes.

[00:17:40] They're actually partners.

[00:17:41] Yeah.

[00:17:41] Yes.

[00:17:42] At this point.

[00:17:43] Yeah.

[00:17:43] All we know is that they're partners.

[00:17:45] Yeah.

[00:17:45] But this is Sean Beans.

[00:17:48] Probably the only role.

[00:17:49] So you know something shady is going to happen.

[00:17:51] One, it's Sean Beans.

[00:17:52] So you know he's about to be a villain.

[00:17:54] And two, this is, spoiler alert, one of the only pieces of media I've seen him in that

[00:18:00] he doesn't die.

[00:18:02] Yeah.

[00:18:02] Yeah.

[00:18:03] Think about it.

[00:18:04] It's like this in Pixels or something.

[00:18:06] Right.

[00:18:07] Yeah.

[00:18:09] I mean, not that I've seen Pixels.

[00:18:11] Right.

[00:18:12] You know you've seen it.

[00:18:15] So, and we are also introduced to Riley.

[00:18:19] Riley.

[00:18:19] I love Riley.

[00:18:21] And Riley is very knowledgeable in tech things.

[00:18:25] I think that's why Ben keeps them around.

[00:18:29] Anyway, so they're going, they have located the Charlotte.

[00:18:33] It is under ice.

[00:18:34] They have to get in and they're kind of looking for the, so Ian and Riley both think we're

[00:18:42] going to find the treasure on the Charlotte.

[00:18:44] Ben is like, uh, we're just looking for another clue.

[00:18:48] Like there's clues upon clues.

[00:18:51] That's how it works.

[00:18:51] And they're like, what the fuck?

[00:18:53] But they go down into the hall and there are tons of barrels of gunpowder.

[00:18:58] But Ben notices that the cat, the skeleton of the captain is guarding one of the barrels.

[00:19:05] So he digs in there and he finds this little pipe.

[00:19:08] And so, uh, Riley's like, is that a billion dollar pipe?

[00:19:14] Is that a million dollar pipe?

[00:19:16] I mean, it was like ivory, right?

[00:19:19] Like, it looked like it was made out of ivory.

[00:19:20] Yes, it was a, and it had a lot of carvings and then the like stem part detached from the

[00:19:28] actual pipe part.

[00:19:29] And then Ben just cuts his finger open and smears his blood all over the stem of the pipe

[00:19:36] because it's actually like a, a rolly stamp and he rolls it out.

[00:19:42] And there's the next verse of the clue.

[00:19:45] And the at least moment is when Myrtle, my grandmother would have said, this is a witchcraft

[00:19:49] movie.

[00:19:50] No more.

[00:19:50] Turn it off.

[00:19:52] Because of the blood?

[00:19:53] Yes.

[00:19:53] Yes.

[00:19:54] Like, how do you just cut yourself like that?

[00:19:56] I mean, I've never, ever done that.

[00:19:59] Like ever.

[00:20:00] Nope.

[00:20:01] And you see it too much.

[00:20:02] Yeah.

[00:20:03] I was like, there's all this gunpowder around.

[00:20:05] You can mix like some spit and gunpowder and like roll it out.

[00:20:09] Right.

[00:20:10] It's gotta be a blood oath.

[00:20:11] Blood oath pack.

[00:20:12] Blood in, blood out.

[00:20:15] Blood in, blood out.

[00:20:20] Also, back to Sean Bean again.

[00:20:23] Yes.

[00:20:23] Tell us.

[00:20:24] When I say that this man has died in every freaking thing he's done, he's, he's died

[00:20:30] 23 times in film and TV.

[00:20:33] 23.

[00:20:34] That'll make no sense.

[00:20:35] Which is your favorite?

[00:20:36] Of course, Game of Thrones.

[00:20:39] Yeah.

[00:20:39] That's a good one.

[00:20:41] So, I'm probably going to get a lot of judgment.

[00:20:46] Like, I know who Sean Bean is.

[00:20:48] I've seen him in things.

[00:20:49] You don't have to.

[00:20:49] We don't have to share everything.

[00:20:51] We don't.

[00:20:52] I don't want hate on our podcast.

[00:20:54] I love you.

[00:20:54] I did watch, I did watch Game of Thrones enough to know who Ned Stark is.

[00:21:01] Right?

[00:21:02] Yeah.

[00:21:02] He was, correct me if I'm wrong.

[00:21:05] He was in Lord of the Rings, right?

[00:21:08] Yes.

[00:21:09] Yes.

[00:21:09] He was born here.

[00:21:10] Yeah.

[00:21:11] Thank you.

[00:21:11] Okay.

[00:21:12] I just.

[00:21:12] He would be replaced by Sam Eagle, I think.

[00:21:16] I'm just kidding.

[00:21:17] I have no idea who to replace him.

[00:21:21] Moving on.

[00:21:23] Yeah.

[00:21:24] Yeah.

[00:21:24] And on that note.

[00:21:25] And on that note.

[00:21:26] And so, but then Ben is doing this weird thing where he's like saying the riddle out loud

[00:21:33] and then he's like, iron pen.

[00:21:37] Like, he's just like, I don't know.

[00:21:40] He is an odd duck.

[00:21:42] And Ian and Riley are just standing there like, what's happening right now?

[00:21:49] Why are you talking to himself?

[00:21:50] He's the rain man of treasure hunts.

[00:21:53] He is.

[00:21:55] But I know, but I know you can't be judging nobody, Jackie, because I've been in one of

[00:22:00] those escape rooms with you and the energy you give off is very Ben Gates.

[00:22:06] No, it's Monica from Friends.

[00:22:09] Oh, I thought it was going to be.

[00:22:12] Which is worse.

[00:22:15] Man, I wish I was like David from Schitt's Creek when he was in the escape room and he

[00:22:27] hated it at first.

[00:22:28] And then he was just like, what's the next clue?

[00:22:32] That's the energy I want to bring.

[00:22:34] Or Alexis just being like, pyramid.

[00:22:37] Yeah.

[00:22:39] Yeah.

[00:22:40] No, you're Monica from Friends.

[00:22:42] A hundred percent.

[00:22:43] I still love you though.

[00:22:44] Thank you.

[00:22:45] I mean, I get it.

[00:22:46] I've thought like, I've thought out loud to myself trying to figure things out, but yeah,

[00:22:50] he takes it to that Nick Cage level.

[00:22:53] Yeah.

[00:22:55] And he's so slow when he's talking too.

[00:22:58] Yeah.

[00:22:59] This movie would have been like 15 minutes shorter if he had just talked in a normal person

[00:23:06] cadence and not his Nick Cage cadence.

[00:23:10] So he finally figures out the pen is, the iron describes what was penned.

[00:23:18] So then he figures out that it's the Declaration of Independence.

[00:23:22] And Ian's like, great, let's go steal it.

[00:23:26] And Ben's like, you, you can't, you can't do that.

[00:23:29] And Ian's like, watch me.

[00:23:31] I'm going to shoot you and your little friend too.

[00:23:34] And so.

[00:23:36] When is he the wicked witch of?

[00:23:41] Has Sean Bean not been the wicked witch of the West yet?

[00:23:46] No.

[00:23:47] Yeah, she does die.

[00:23:49] That's who he's going to play next.

[00:23:50] Like you didn't hear.

[00:23:52] He got the book wicked.

[00:23:54] The movie.

[00:23:56] It's going to be alpha.

[00:24:00] So there's a fight with guns and.

[00:24:08] And Ben does this thing where he's like, he lights a flare and he's like, if you shoot

[00:24:13] me, I'll drop it.

[00:24:14] The whole hole is full of gunpowder.

[00:24:16] It's going to explode.

[00:24:17] No one will get out.

[00:24:18] And then he's like, or catch.

[00:24:21] And then Ian does.

[00:24:24] And he's like, well, fuck.

[00:24:27] But apparently Ian had gunpowder all over himself.

[00:24:30] So homeboy had to stop, drop and roll because he was on fire.

[00:24:34] And so then that's when Riley and Ben were able to escape.

[00:24:40] Everyone made it out of that ship exploding, which I call bullshit.

[00:24:44] Yeah.

[00:24:46] Yeah, for real.

[00:24:47] Okay.

[00:24:48] Well, here's what I want to know.

[00:24:49] Yes.

[00:24:50] Okay.

[00:24:50] He figures out everything.

[00:24:51] Ian says, we're going to steal it.

[00:24:54] Why at this moment when you're still underwater or whatever in the ship in Antarctica, do you

[00:24:59] tell him like, I'm not going to go with your plan here?

[00:25:02] Yeah.

[00:25:03] Wait till you're back safe on land, you know, in wherever in the US and then say something.

[00:25:09] Yeah.

[00:25:09] It's all cool.

[00:25:10] He doesn't even have to tell you his plan.

[00:25:13] Like, don't even tell Ian that you're going to foil his plot.

[00:25:19] Exactly.

[00:25:20] Yes.

[00:25:20] It's the rain man in him.

[00:25:23] He can't help it.

[00:25:24] That thinking out loud again.

[00:25:26] Yeah.

[00:25:27] Yeah.

[00:25:27] Yeah.

[00:25:27] Yeah.

[00:25:27] So now, now we're back in Washington, DC and legit Ben does try to do things the legal

[00:25:37] way.

[00:25:37] He, he goes to the CIA and the FBI and then the archives director, um, who is Abigail, Abigail

[00:25:45] chase played by Dan, Diane Kruger.

[00:25:48] Who could not cover her German accent.

[00:25:51] No.

[00:25:52] At all.

[00:25:53] Hey, here's what I want to know.

[00:25:54] Why did she have to?

[00:25:56] Yeah.

[00:25:57] They could have just made her.

[00:25:58] Right.

[00:25:59] Because they made some bullshit line about she's Pennsylvania Dutch.

[00:26:05] Like, Oh, maybe that's why.

[00:26:06] Yeah.

[00:26:07] You're right about that girl.

[00:26:08] You're German.

[00:26:09] Just be German.

[00:26:11] You can work at the archives in DC and be German.

[00:26:15] It's fine.

[00:26:16] Yeah.

[00:26:17] I mean, I would think so.

[00:26:18] Yeah.

[00:26:20] Or work with a dialect coach either way.

[00:26:25] That's where all the money went.

[00:26:27] Exactly.

[00:26:28] You spent too much on the toupees.

[00:26:30] You couldn't get a dialect coach.

[00:26:33] We're just going to make a long running list of all the things the money should have gone.

[00:26:37] Yes.

[00:26:38] I like it.

[00:26:40] I'll put up titles every time we think of something.

[00:26:44] A hundred million dollars.

[00:26:46] A hundred million dollars.

[00:26:47] Maybe they had to pay the government to shoot in places.

[00:26:51] That's all I can think of.

[00:26:52] Probably.

[00:26:53] I guess.

[00:26:54] Maybe they really dug that hole.

[00:26:55] Well, not necessarily because a lot of where they filmed wasn't even at some of these locations.

[00:27:05] So, again, where did the money go?

[00:27:09] Show me the receipts.

[00:27:10] Cocaine dog.

[00:27:12] Probably.

[00:27:16] Gary Bruckheimer and Donald Turtle Tom in a hotel room with cocaine.

[00:27:21] No.

[00:27:23] I don't know.

[00:27:25] I don't know.

[00:27:25] But it does look really nice.

[00:27:27] It's shot very well.

[00:27:28] It is.

[00:27:29] Yeah.

[00:27:30] So, now we're in D.C.

[00:27:33] Ben Gates has exhausted all of his options.

[00:27:37] But while he is in Abigail Chase's office, he sees that she has George Washington's campaign buttons.

[00:27:47] But she's missing one.

[00:27:49] Which, come to find out, she's not really missing one.

[00:27:53] So, most of the buttons in Abigail's collection could be referred to as the 1789 inaugural.

[00:28:00] But the button Ben ultimately sends Abigail is the Pater Patri button, which was already shown to be in her collection.

[00:28:12] I guess she needed two.

[00:28:15] I don't know.

[00:28:16] I have a backup in case you lose it.

[00:28:17] Right?

[00:28:17] Right?

[00:28:18] So, but what we see Ben doing prior to sending her the inaugurational button is he's made this, like, phosphorescent, fluorescent liquid.

[00:28:31] And he's, like, trying it out.

[00:28:32] You don't know what he's doing with it yet.

[00:28:34] But he's concocting.

[00:28:36] And so, now it's, like, this big event.

[00:28:40] Oh, no.

[00:28:41] Prior to this, Riley is doing a recon.

[00:28:44] He's going and tapping into the camera system.

[00:28:48] Because there's going to be, like, this big gala.

[00:28:50] And so, that's when they're going to use the opportunity to steal the Declaration of Independence.

[00:28:56] I just, and this is where they lost me at this age.

[00:29:00] Because, come on now.

[00:29:03] Out of all the things that are possible, this is not one of them.

[00:29:10] It's just not.

[00:29:12] But you're not, you're not, you're not getting the Declaration of Independence at all.

[00:29:19] Like, come on.

[00:29:21] I thought we were suspending belief.

[00:29:24] Yeah, on, like, the fact that they messed up all the historical shit.

[00:29:28] But, like, this is just, come on.

[00:29:31] Logic defying.

[00:29:32] This don't make any sense.

[00:29:34] Yeah, yeah.

[00:29:34] No, no, I agree.

[00:29:36] It's super ridiculous.

[00:29:37] But it's fun.

[00:29:38] It is so much fun.

[00:29:39] I think, I mean, if I ever get a chance to use the Declaration of Independence as, like, a bulletproof shield, like, I'm totally doing that.

[00:29:47] So, come on.

[00:29:48] Why wasn't that Captain America shield?

[00:29:50] Come on.

[00:29:52] Oh, that would have been genius.

[00:29:54] Yes.

[00:29:56] I just, I think what would have made it even more intriguing for me is if they had an inside man that kind of helped them.

[00:30:05] Because then I'm like, okay, they had the inside track.

[00:30:07] But what they figured out, what Riley kind of talks through and what, no, Riley doesn't talk through.

[00:30:16] Ben be doing more of that talking out loud.

[00:30:19] Yeah.

[00:30:20] So, Ben is like, look, there's a way to do this.

[00:30:23] And Riley's like, there's no way.

[00:30:25] It's guarded all the time.

[00:30:26] It's in a, I'm calling a pressure cooker because it's completely encased.

[00:30:33] And then when it's not encased, every night it's going down this, to this safe all the way down at the bottom.

[00:30:41] Like a plum proof, like vault.

[00:30:42] Yes.

[00:30:42] And so Ben's like, but, but there is a way.

[00:30:50] If for whatever reason, like because it's heat sensitive, if anybody's coming near it and the temperature rises because the document is so sensitive.

[00:31:01] It's so sensitive.

[00:31:02] Well, we about to steal this shit and take it out.

[00:31:04] But okay.

[00:31:05] Okay.

[00:31:05] I digress.

[00:31:07] So did this remind anybody of that 90s movie Sneakers with Robert Redford?

[00:31:13] I don't know.

[00:31:14] I didn't think about that.

[00:31:15] I haven't seen that movie in so long.

[00:31:17] I don't think I've ever seen it.

[00:31:19] I've shelved it.

[00:31:21] I got to, I got to.

[00:31:23] No worries.

[00:31:24] Yeah.

[00:31:24] Yeah.

[00:31:24] So it's like this, you know, they got to sneak and get this, this box from this room and same thing.

[00:31:29] It's like heat sensitive.

[00:31:31] So he has to, they have to adjust the air and he has to like move ridiculously slow because of the motion sensors.

[00:31:39] And I mean, there's it just, every time they were talking about, I was like, okay,

[00:31:42] so we're going to see him like go super slow.

[00:31:45] We're going to see them change it.

[00:31:46] I know.

[00:31:47] No, they did it from, did they do it scene for scene pretty much or?

[00:31:51] No, it just reminded me of it.

[00:31:55] So, but it also kind of reminded me of Tom Cruise when he had to go take the knock list for Mission Impossible.

[00:32:00] The first one.

[00:32:01] Yes.

[00:32:02] Which one came out first?

[00:32:04] Tom Cruise could have done it.

[00:32:05] Mission Impossible.

[00:32:06] Mission Impossible.

[00:32:07] That was in the 90s.

[00:32:08] Yeah.

[00:32:08] Yeah.

[00:32:09] It was like 97, 98, something like that.

[00:32:10] Maybe 96.

[00:32:11] Tom Cruise could do anything in real life and on the screen.

[00:32:15] The man is ridiculously insane.

[00:32:19] But if my life depends on it.

[00:32:22] Blink twice if you need to be rescued from Tom Cruise right now.

[00:32:26] I'm serious.

[00:32:28] He fully commits to doing this shit in these movies.

[00:32:33] And so does Nick Cage with his, I'm sorry.

[00:32:38] Is Nick Cage going to space for a Mission Impossible movie?

[00:32:41] I think not.

[00:32:43] I think not.

[00:32:44] Nick Cage was just in a movie where he played himself.

[00:32:49] Oh, man.

[00:32:49] How meta is that?

[00:32:51] I'm not asking for meta.

[00:32:53] I'm saying that Tom Cruise, hands down, if I had to put my trust in who was going to for real save me in real life with actual skills, it'd be that man.

[00:33:05] Every movie he does, he goes so like, it's not just hard, but he goes so method.

[00:33:13] He learns how to do all this shit.

[00:33:15] He does all his own stunts.

[00:33:17] He's the guy.

[00:33:17] He knows how to fly planes.

[00:33:19] He is doing every single thing we see in these movies.

[00:33:23] He's psychotic and he's stuck in some sort of crazy cult.

[00:33:28] That bitch going to save our lives.

[00:33:30] I was waiting for someone to say it.

[00:33:32] I love Nick Cage, but I don't trust that nepotism baby with a curse on him because I'll tell that story in a second.

[00:33:42] To save my life.

[00:33:44] Oh, yeah.

[00:33:46] Oh, yeah.

[00:33:46] And no, this is not Danielle being conspiracy theory.

[00:33:50] When I went to New Orleans and I did a ghost tour, because that's real.

[00:33:56] We went to the house that Nicholas Cage bought.

[00:34:02] The house, if you've ever seen American Horror Story, there's the coven season.

[00:34:09] The character of Kathy Bates is based on a real person.

[00:34:12] And that real life person was crazy and racist.

[00:34:17] And they were torturing their slaves and did all sorts of stuff in their house.

[00:34:23] And they got ran out of New Orleans, just to make the story short.

[00:34:26] And so pretty much every single person who's ever bought that house has been cursed or things go bad.

[00:34:35] And so the very time, the time period in which Nicholas Cage bought this house in New Orleans, his career tanked.

[00:34:43] It has not been able to be resuscitated whatsoever.

[00:34:47] Knowing this and believing in this fully.

[00:34:49] Obviously, he sold the house.

[00:34:51] But he went to someone to ask to help him not be cursed anymore.

[00:34:57] So they told him to build this big ass, like, I don't even want to say.

[00:35:03] It's not like a mausoleum, but it's this weird thing in a graveyard that he has.

[00:35:09] I don't know what to call it.

[00:35:10] And they said if he built it, he would not be cursed anymore.

[00:35:15] That shit is not worth a nickel.

[00:35:18] It did not do nothing to his career.

[00:35:20] So.

[00:35:22] I don't know.

[00:35:23] That new movie is supposed to be like ridiculously good.

[00:35:26] Well, maybe that might resuscitate.

[00:35:28] But it's so many years since he's done his little ritual.

[00:35:31] I don't know.

[00:35:32] I just thought that was very interesting.

[00:35:34] I think once you do Ghost Rider 2, there's just not very much coming back from that.

[00:35:39] Yeah.

[00:35:40] Well, you know, I hope to see him in the MCU, honestly.

[00:35:43] Oh, I do too.

[00:35:44] Yeah.

[00:35:44] There's many.

[00:35:45] There's very few actors who have such an appreciation for comic books as much as he does.

[00:35:52] Yeah.

[00:35:52] I mean, he named his son Kal-El.

[00:35:54] Yeah.

[00:35:55] Yeah.

[00:35:55] Have you ever seen his, I don't know if he was auditioning for Superman?

[00:36:05] Oh, yeah.

[00:36:06] Well, he was going to be in it before they pulled the plug.

[00:36:08] Yeah.

[00:36:09] I saw the picture.

[00:36:10] It's.

[00:36:10] It's bad.

[00:36:12] Bonkers.

[00:36:12] It's like bananas.

[00:36:15] He's got like the long hair and it's like this crazy metallic suit.

[00:36:19] It has nothing to do with the Declaration of Independence, but I'm still into it.

[00:36:23] Yeah.

[00:36:25] In another universe, he did that movie.

[00:36:30] Oh, he's just part of the multiverse.

[00:36:32] Yes.

[00:36:33] Don't worry, the multiverse.

[00:36:34] He was Superman.

[00:36:36] Oh, so Riley goes in and he trips the heat sensor.

[00:36:42] Poor old lady is just standing there looking at it.

[00:36:45] But he uses a little laser, trips the heat sensor, which pulls the real declaration underground.

[00:36:51] And now there's like a faux one displayed.

[00:36:54] So now that they know it's the real one that's underground, they can go retrieve it while the gala is going on.

[00:37:03] And so then it's the night of the gala.

[00:37:07] It's real easy to sneak in.

[00:37:09] You just dress up as a maintenance man and print you out a badge.

[00:37:15] That's how I always get into all my gals.

[00:37:17] Right?

[00:37:19] And so he has this little tool belt, which has all of his things he needs to get down into the vault.

[00:37:26] So now he's Batman.

[00:37:28] He is.

[00:37:29] Ben Gates is Batman.

[00:37:32] Have you ever seen Ben Gates and Bruce Banner in a room together?

[00:37:37] Bruce Banner?

[00:37:38] Bruce Banner?

[00:37:39] Not Bruce Banner, Bruce Wayne.

[00:37:40] Sorry.

[00:37:43] There's too many Bruce's in that movie.

[00:37:46] There are a lot of Bruce's, yeah.

[00:37:48] Did y'all buy their chemistry between Ben and...

[00:37:53] Abigail?

[00:37:54] No, not at all.

[00:37:55] Mm-mm.

[00:37:58] No.

[00:37:59] Yeah.

[00:38:00] And apparently they would go and do karaoke together to help bond with one another.

[00:38:07] What songs Nick Cage was singing?

[00:38:10] Guess.

[00:38:10] Just throw out your first guess.

[00:38:11] Anything by Elvis.

[00:38:13] Oh, that's true.

[00:38:14] That's true.

[00:38:14] But the first duet that popped into my head was Don't Go Breaking My Heart by Tom John and Kiki D.

[00:38:26] I said, no, she's not going to sing this song.

[00:38:29] We have ESPN.

[00:38:32] Tonight, we are one.

[00:38:35] It must be Tom Cruise.

[00:38:37] Is it bad that I can actually picture him singing that?

[00:38:38] Yes.

[00:38:39] No, it's not.

[00:38:40] And like doing the shimmy back and forth as they sing it.

[00:38:43] Don't go break your mind.

[00:38:45] I couldn't if I tried.

[00:38:50] So getting back to it.

[00:38:52] Ben has a three-piece suit on underneath or a tuxedo on underneath his maintenance jumpsuit.

[00:39:00] So now he's ready to party.

[00:39:02] Yes.

[00:39:03] How does he get that on?

[00:39:05] I would have loved to pull away like with Velcro versus a zip.

[00:39:09] I just feel like it would have been more fun, you know?

[00:39:13] Just like warm-up pants.

[00:39:16] Yes.

[00:39:18] Yes, exactly.

[00:39:20] Just a wet.

[00:39:23] So he goes out.

[00:39:25] He bumps into Abigail.

[00:39:28] He was stalking her because he needs her fingerprints.

[00:39:32] So he hands her a flute of champagne.

[00:39:36] Then this other rando dude comes over, also has a flute of champagne for her.

[00:39:41] So Ben's like, oh, I'll take that from you and takes the one that she's holding.

[00:39:45] So now he runs back into the men's room and does some Ziploc bag chemistry

[00:39:52] to bring out the fingerprints that are on the champagne flute.

[00:39:57] I believe it.

[00:39:58] I learned this from Beverly Hills Cop.

[00:40:02] Some super glue.

[00:40:03] You can make it happen.

[00:40:04] All the years that I took all the sciences and all the chemistry,

[00:40:08] not once did we learn Ziploc chemistry.

[00:40:13] You missed that elective.

[00:40:15] I guess so.

[00:40:17] I guess so.

[00:40:18] So, and then he has like a finger condom that he rolls on

[00:40:23] so that he can get her fingerprints.

[00:40:26] You disappeared, Daniel.

[00:40:30] I love these virtual backgrounds.

[00:40:35] So now he's ready.

[00:40:37] Cause he's got, he's got his condo.

[00:40:40] He's got it.

[00:40:43] He's practicing safe breaking and entering.

[00:40:48] Right.

[00:40:48] And so he goes over to the little computery thing.

[00:40:52] He does the little fingerprint.

[00:40:54] And now this is where the phosphorescence come back in because that button was covered in the stuff.

[00:41:00] And she had typed in her password earlier.

[00:41:08] So he pot, he is able to like UV light, see what letters were used.

[00:41:14] Riley's running a, some sort of code to, to crack the code.

[00:41:18] And then Ben's just like Valley Forge.

[00:41:22] He used the L twice.

[00:41:25] And so he gets in no problem.

[00:41:28] Meanwhile, back at the ranch.

[00:41:31] Ian is underground, just blowing shit up.

[00:41:35] Yeah.

[00:41:36] And see, I love, I love Ian's style here.

[00:41:38] He's just like, we're just going to go in and get it.

[00:41:40] I don't care what we have to do.

[00:41:41] You know, Ben's all like trying to Ocean's 11 it.

[00:41:44] And he's like, no, no, no.

[00:41:46] We're just, we're going to bond this.

[00:41:48] He's telling, he's going to tell the government, I had to steal it.

[00:41:51] So he wouldn't steal it.

[00:41:52] Yes.

[00:41:53] I would take better care of it.

[00:41:54] That's exactly what he tells him.

[00:41:57] Yeah.

[00:41:58] It's the dumbest thing.

[00:41:59] But I love it.

[00:42:01] Does he not, the other guy, does he not think that like, you're like, this is beyond federal

[00:42:09] charges.

[00:42:09] This is, I'm locking you away for the rest of your life.

[00:42:12] Like, even if you get the treasure and get all this money, like, where the hell do you

[00:42:17] think you're going to hide?

[00:42:18] The American government hates nothing more than you fucking with the fake history that

[00:42:24] they have laid upon us.

[00:42:26] That may be money.

[00:42:27] I mean, he might be able to buy his way out of it.

[00:42:30] You're right.

[00:42:30] Harvey Keitel just said he needs to arrest someone.

[00:42:35] That's true.

[00:42:36] Yeah.

[00:42:36] It doesn't matter who.

[00:42:37] It doesn't matter who.

[00:42:38] That's why Ben's like, oh, I'll get you someone.

[00:42:41] Okay.

[00:42:42] I got you.

[00:42:43] I got you.

[00:42:44] They had a lot of conversations when I really feel like they just would have busted his ass.

[00:42:49] Like, this is where I'm like.

[00:42:51] I thought that too.

[00:42:51] That was my thought too.

[00:42:53] Exactly.

[00:42:53] Oh, we having conversations?

[00:42:56] Okay.

[00:42:58] So Ben gets in.

[00:43:00] He can't get all the screws out of the pressure cooker in order to get the declaration out

[00:43:06] in time.

[00:43:07] So he's like, I'll just do it in the elevator.

[00:43:09] That shit must be so heavy.

[00:43:12] How much do you think that thing weighs?

[00:43:14] Because it's bulletproof glass, three inch bulletproof glass.

[00:43:19] Maybe he's doing burpees.

[00:43:21] You don't know.

[00:43:22] I know.

[00:43:23] Arm day is a must.

[00:43:26] So as he's like waiting for the elevator, here comes Ian blasting his way in and they start

[00:43:33] shooting him.

[00:43:34] But Ben is using the declaration as a shield and backing up into the elevator.

[00:43:41] Captain America, yo.

[00:43:42] Captain America.

[00:43:44] And so Ben gets away with the declaration.

[00:43:47] He gets the case open in the elevator, I guess, while we're just going up to the lobby.

[00:43:54] Question mark?

[00:43:54] Yeah.

[00:43:55] Yeah, he does.

[00:43:57] And so now he...

[00:43:59] Why not?

[00:44:02] He's now in the souvenir shop and the lady, the cashier, she doesn't miss anything.

[00:44:10] She sees what's happening in her souvenir shop and that man is trying to steal a replica of

[00:44:15] the decoration.

[00:44:15] Give that lady a raise.

[00:44:17] She deserves a raise.

[00:44:18] She is on point.

[00:44:20] Yeah.

[00:44:21] And Ben lives in a modern society.

[00:44:23] He doesn't carry cash.

[00:44:25] So he has to use his credit card to buy the Declaration of Independence, which is how the

[00:44:33] FBI can track him.

[00:44:35] So now there's a...

[00:44:38] Oh, so Abigail follows Ben out because at this time, now they've realized that the vault

[00:44:46] has been breached.

[00:44:47] And she's like, no, you effing didn't.

[00:44:50] Like, go stomping out there.

[00:44:54] You know how there's like those TikToks of like white women shit?

[00:45:00] This is it.

[00:45:02] Someone has just stolen the Declaration of Independence.

[00:45:06] She's like, I'm getting it back.

[00:45:08] I'll go do it.

[00:45:10] In a ball gown and heels.

[00:45:12] Watch me.

[00:45:15] She doesn't grab a weapon.

[00:45:17] She doesn't have a plan.

[00:45:19] She's just yelling.

[00:45:20] My white lady privileges are about to whip your ass.

[00:45:27] And they're like, just standing there arguing.

[00:45:30] And Riley is like, get in the fucking van.

[00:45:32] Get in the van now.

[00:45:33] Come on, let's go.

[00:45:34] We have committed multiple felonies.

[00:45:37] We will go to prison forever.

[00:45:40] Get in the fucking van.

[00:45:41] So she snatches the Declaration from him.

[00:45:46] He's like, OK, take it.

[00:45:47] Whatever.

[00:45:48] They drive off.

[00:45:50] But Ian sees her handing it.

[00:45:52] And so Ian now kidnaps Abigail.

[00:45:56] And now we're in this.

[00:45:57] Oh, and then he unrolls it or opens the canister.

[00:46:02] I can't remember which.

[00:46:02] And the price tag is on it.

[00:46:04] So it's a fake.

[00:46:05] And he has the real one.

[00:46:07] So he actually bought two.

[00:46:09] His real one.

[00:46:11] And then a fake.

[00:46:12] Abigail would have been like, bye.

[00:46:15] I don't know this bitch.

[00:46:16] Why are you kidnapping somebody?

[00:46:18] I don't know.

[00:46:19] I don't know her.

[00:46:20] So we're now, as the audience, supposed to pretend that we believe that in the two to three

[00:46:27] interactions these two idiots have had together, Ben is invested.

[00:46:32] Well, you know, they were flirty.

[00:46:34] Oh, really please.

[00:46:35] I think Ben just has.

[00:46:36] You know, anytime you give a lady a coin, I mean, you're kind of showing your love.

[00:46:39] So that means they're going steady now.

[00:46:41] It's like the penguins and the rocks.

[00:46:45] They're going steady now.

[00:46:46] OK, I missed.

[00:46:47] The patria-patria coin, you know, you gotta.

[00:46:51] I missed some rules.

[00:46:51] You have two.

[00:46:52] That's like eloping, basically.

[00:46:54] Jerry, I'm a single lady, so I don't know how courting works.

[00:46:59] Sorry.

[00:47:00] So thank you for teaching me these rules.

[00:47:02] I need somebody to give me a coin, please.

[00:47:05] Thank you.

[00:47:08] Oh, man.

[00:47:09] Yeah.

[00:47:10] Tom Cruise.

[00:47:10] It is odd.

[00:47:11] It's super odd.

[00:47:12] But I think we're supposed to think at this point that, you know, it's like he has morals.

[00:47:17] He's better than Ian.

[00:47:19] Yes.

[00:47:19] So of course he's got to go save the girl, even though they don't really have any kind

[00:47:23] of interaction.

[00:47:25] No chemistry.

[00:47:26] Zero.

[00:47:27] No, not really.

[00:47:27] No.

[00:47:28] I feel like National Treasure would have been 10 times better if they had followed what

[00:47:35] the mummy did with the chemistry of those two characters.

[00:47:39] And it was a slow burn, you know.

[00:47:44] Not this.

[00:47:45] Oh, I was like, I was like, if you just took Rick and Evie and like that, those are the

[00:47:51] main characters of National Treasure.

[00:47:53] That would have been amazing.

[00:47:54] It's like, instead of the mummy too, we just moved to National Treasure.

[00:47:59] Yes.

[00:48:00] I mean, like, or imagine like Kurt Russell as like the lead.

[00:48:05] Yes.

[00:48:06] And Goldie Hawn.

[00:48:07] Patrick Swayze even.

[00:48:09] I mean.

[00:48:09] Yes.

[00:48:10] I got chills.

[00:48:12] Them multiplying.

[00:48:15] That was their second karaoke duet.

[00:48:17] Yes.

[00:48:19] Definitely.

[00:48:20] They totally did that one.

[00:48:22] Yeah.

[00:48:23] But, but, but Diane Kruger was, was Zuko.

[00:48:28] Yes, exactly.

[00:48:32] Oh, I love it.

[00:48:34] So now there's just a giant chase scene.

[00:48:38] The FBI is catching on.

[00:48:41] And Ben's like, well, we can't go to my house.

[00:48:44] I use my credit card.

[00:48:46] So let's just go to my dad's house.

[00:48:48] Cause I need some, I got to pick up some letters anyway.

[00:48:51] Jerry.

[00:48:53] If you use your credit card and you know,

[00:48:55] Popo and the FBI after you.

[00:48:58] Nope.

[00:48:58] Would you go to your mama's house and be like, it's cool.

[00:49:01] Nope.

[00:49:02] Nope.

[00:49:02] Nope.

[00:49:04] Well, I have a Hispanic mom, so she might like beat him up.

[00:49:08] It's true.

[00:49:09] Pull out a chancla.

[00:49:11] Get out of my house.

[00:49:14] Yes.

[00:49:14] This was a very.

[00:49:15] But no.

[00:49:17] How do you just do that to your dad?

[00:49:19] Come on.

[00:49:20] Right.

[00:49:20] Right.

[00:49:21] And I love how his dad be snitching on him too.

[00:49:23] Cause my mom would lie.

[00:49:25] She, she could see me right there in her house and be like,

[00:49:28] she ain't here.

[00:49:29] Yeah.

[00:49:30] Yeah.

[00:49:31] I don't know what she did, but I haven't seen her.

[00:49:35] I'm a stick beside her.

[00:49:36] That's what she's going to say.

[00:49:38] So like, wouldn't it.

[00:49:40] Okay.

[00:49:41] I have a couple of questions.

[00:49:42] Wouldn't it have been easier to just go to either Riley's house or.

[00:49:49] What's her house.

[00:49:50] Yeah.

[00:49:52] Abigail.

[00:49:53] So Abigail.

[00:49:53] Thank you.

[00:49:54] And second.

[00:49:56] I grew up.

[00:49:58] This came out into 2004.

[00:50:01] Right.

[00:50:02] We couldn't just look up the silence.

[00:50:04] Do good letters online.

[00:50:06] Well, they apparently.

[00:50:08] They try.

[00:50:09] Don't they?

[00:50:10] And they're just not there.

[00:50:12] Oh, the dad.

[00:50:13] The dad.

[00:50:14] Well, the.

[00:50:15] He.

[00:50:16] He can't look.

[00:50:17] Oh, no.

[00:50:17] I'm thinking of something else.

[00:50:18] I'm thinking of later on in the movie.

[00:50:19] He thinks the dad has them.

[00:50:21] Yeah.

[00:50:22] Which is why he goes there.

[00:50:24] But like, just go to a library and look them up.

[00:50:27] Even if you don't have these.

[00:50:29] Well, and.

[00:50:30] I'm sure they were by 2004.

[00:50:34] It doesn't seem like.

[00:50:35] It wasn't.

[00:50:36] It wasn't like it was 1996.

[00:50:37] And we was just on Prodigy.

[00:50:41] And AOL.

[00:50:42] AOL.

[00:50:43] We had the Googles.

[00:50:45] I mean, but it wasn't.

[00:50:46] Oh, wait, wait, wait.

[00:50:47] Google.

[00:50:49] Well, we didn't have Google Photo yet.

[00:50:51] I don't think.

[00:50:53] Because that didn't happen to JLo.

[00:50:54] Well, then you use Webcrawler.

[00:50:56] Because that's what you used before the Google.

[00:50:59] You just ask Jeeves, y'all.

[00:51:01] Yes.

[00:51:02] R.I.P.

[00:51:03] Had to have been a way.

[00:51:06] To look up these letters.

[00:51:07] Instead of going to dad's house.

[00:51:09] But it had.

[00:51:10] Well, instead of staying at dad's house.

[00:51:14] Because again, he didn't know dad gave them away.

[00:51:17] But why go to dad's in the first place?

[00:51:19] You're a wanted felon.

[00:51:20] And he's going to be the next person on the FBI's list.

[00:51:24] The next clue.

[00:51:26] Yeah.

[00:51:26] Look it up on the Google.

[00:51:28] He's a witch, bro.

[00:51:33] She came down in a bubble.

[00:51:39] How many Wizard of Oz references are we going to do?

[00:51:43] I don't know.

[00:51:43] This episode.

[00:51:45] Sorry, Gary.

[00:51:46] So anyway, I'm getting way off track.

[00:51:49] But I feel like that was a very poor plan to go to dad's house.

[00:51:54] He had other resources he could use.

[00:51:56] So I mean, yeah, it totally was.

[00:51:57] But I think he wanted them because, I mean, as we've seen, like, who knows what else is hidden on these letters?

[00:52:03] I mean, he might have rubbed lemons all over it and come up with some sort of, you know, brujeria or something.

[00:52:08] But at his house, in his clean room, he had photocopies.

[00:52:14] That was just ridiculous.

[00:52:14] Yeah.

[00:52:14] Yeah.

[00:52:15] He had photocopies of the letters.

[00:52:20] Oh, well, yeah.

[00:52:21] He had to be able to check for other clues that weren't, like, copied.

[00:52:27] Tell you what, though, at least this part was pretty accurate because there were, you know, Ben Franklin did actually write the silence do-good letters.

[00:52:34] And there were, you know, I think they said there were 14 or something.

[00:52:37] And there actually really were.

[00:52:38] So at least we can check off the accuracy part there.

[00:52:42] There are conspiracies.

[00:52:44] Our word on the street, secret words on the street was that Ben was writing to a secret lover.

[00:52:51] And he was a man.

[00:52:52] Well, I mean, that wouldn't surprise me.

[00:52:54] But with some of the stuff I've heard of the founding fathers, it wouldn't surprise me.

[00:53:00] Fair.

[00:53:01] So now we're at dad's house.

[00:53:03] Dad's just kind of eating pizza and watching TV.

[00:53:06] And I was like, what's y'all doing with that piece of paper?

[00:53:10] It looks old.

[00:53:11] You need heat.

[00:53:13] If it's a cipher, you need a hidden tank.

[00:53:17] You need heat.

[00:53:19] And so they blow on it.

[00:53:21] That doesn't work.

[00:53:22] Like, come on, y'all have hot breath, but not that hot.

[00:53:25] You know?

[00:53:26] Well, they see a little ink start to shine through.

[00:53:29] And so they know they're on the right track.

[00:53:31] More lemon juice.

[00:53:33] No, more lemon juice and more heat.

[00:53:35] And then they take a goddamn blow dryer.

[00:53:38] Blow dryer.

[00:53:39] Yeah.

[00:53:40] This is the worst thing you could do to this kind of...

[00:53:43] Delicate piece of my nation's history.

[00:53:45] And it's not made out of just paper.

[00:53:48] It's like animal hide or something, too.

[00:53:50] Yeah.

[00:53:50] Yeah.

[00:53:50] There's some animal parchment in there.

[00:53:52] Yeah.

[00:53:53] Yeah.

[00:53:53] And apparently the document's ink would have dried out over time due to exposure and damaging

[00:54:02] light.

[00:54:02] So the ink wouldn't have lasted.

[00:54:04] So this movie, as we continue to find plot holes, is obsolete, apparently.

[00:54:11] Well, I don't know.

[00:54:11] Because they're only shining light on the front and not the back.

[00:54:14] That's true.

[00:54:15] It's true.

[00:54:16] I don't know.

[00:54:18] I want it to be real.

[00:54:20] I know.

[00:54:23] Except for the Googling the silent studio.

[00:54:26] Jesus.

[00:54:27] So far, I'm not seeing any plot holes.

[00:54:29] It's all checking out.

[00:54:30] All checks out.

[00:54:31] So, Jerry, what happens next?

[00:54:33] Do you remember?

[00:54:35] All right.

[00:54:36] So they leave because they know the cops are on their trail.

[00:54:41] So they tie up their dad, right?

[00:54:43] And this is when the FBI guys come and they come investigate the dad.

[00:54:51] But I think what happens next with Ben, is this where they go to the shops?

[00:54:56] Is this where they go change their clothes and buy all their clothes and all that?

[00:54:59] Yes.

[00:55:02] Yes.

[00:55:02] No, no.

[00:55:03] Well, yes.

[00:55:05] Ben and Abigail are at a store and Riley is paying a kid to go in.

[00:55:12] Oh, that's what happened.

[00:55:14] The Ottendorf cipher on the silence do good letters.

[00:55:17] On the silence do good letters.

[00:55:18] Yeah.

[00:55:18] So Riley is like across the street from where they're being housed because dad had donated

[00:55:22] them.

[00:55:23] So he didn't have them.

[00:55:24] But this is where Ian's men actually do Google, right?

[00:55:31] Yes.

[00:55:32] Well, at least to see where the silence do.

[00:55:35] You're good.

[00:55:37] So Jerry, let's talk about the scene of them getting new clothes.

[00:55:44] Okay.

[00:55:45] Yeah.

[00:55:45] Yeah.

[00:55:46] This is first of all, who has men and women's changing rooms like right next to each other

[00:55:51] like that?

[00:55:51] Right.

[00:55:52] I mean, I've never seen that.

[00:55:54] That seems like that's a lawsuit waiting to happen.

[00:55:56] Right.

[00:55:56] I'm sorry.

[00:55:58] And also like the doors are like, like a barn doors.

[00:56:03] Saloon doors.

[00:56:04] Yeah.

[00:56:05] Yeah.

[00:56:05] And so my Titas might be out in this bitch because it might be too high or low.

[00:56:12] You know what I'm saying?

[00:56:13] Because someone can look right or someone could just look over the door.

[00:56:17] Gotcha.

[00:56:17] This is not real.

[00:56:19] And they are staring at each other while they're cheating.

[00:56:22] I'm like, what's happening?

[00:56:24] Yeah.

[00:56:24] Yeah.

[00:56:25] It's ridiculous.

[00:56:27] But, you know, this is supposed to be where they fall in love.

[00:56:31] But there's no chemistry.

[00:56:33] Rick and Eva could never do this scene without you feeling sweaty and hot because it's so

[00:56:38] steamy.

[00:56:38] This is like, how much more can we give you where you're practically butt naked in front

[00:56:45] of each other and there's still no chemistry?

[00:56:48] Yeah.

[00:56:48] You know what?

[00:56:49] It would have almost been better if they were just like brother and sister.

[00:56:53] Yes.

[00:56:54] And like one didn't believe in the legend.

[00:56:59] One legend and the other did.

[00:57:02] Yes, they are giving brother-sister vibes.

[00:57:06] I think she had been played.

[00:57:08] Maybe like if you wanted to keep Nick Cage, I think maybe cast her as like Elizabeth Shue.

[00:57:13] You know?

[00:57:14] You're bringing us back to leaving Las Vegas.

[00:57:18] You hit slick, Jerry.

[00:57:22] Well, I mean, I actually bought that chemistry there.

[00:57:24] So if you're going to have that love story, like make it really work.

[00:57:30] Yeah.

[00:57:31] And Diane Kruger was like very much younger than Nicolas Cage.

[00:57:36] Why couldn't we have gotten an actress who was maybe at his age range?

[00:57:43] Yeah.

[00:57:45] Yeah.

[00:57:45] I feel like, you know who I would have recast?

[00:57:50] Monica Potter.

[00:57:52] Yes.

[00:57:52] Yes.

[00:57:52] I do like her.

[00:57:55] I love Monica Potter.

[00:57:56] She plays younger than she actually is.

[00:57:59] So they're probably fairly close in age.

[00:58:02] And she just has, I don't know, like some charm that just Diane Kruger didn't bring.

[00:58:08] I call her the low budget Julia Roberts.

[00:58:11] It's true.

[00:58:12] I used to think they were related for the longest time.

[00:58:15] Yeah.

[00:58:15] Yeah.

[00:58:21] Yeah.

[00:58:22] So what else happens?

[00:58:23] What's next?

[00:58:25] Oh, so there, Riley gets all but the last four letters.

[00:58:29] And then he sees a billboard on a bus because it's pass and blank.

[00:58:36] And it's four more letters.

[00:58:37] And he sees pass and stow on this billboard that has the Liberty Bell on it.

[00:58:43] So he has the last four letters.

[00:58:44] He doesn't need the kid to come back.

[00:58:46] He's already paid the kid.

[00:58:48] But at this time, Ian's going in and he sees the kid counting.

[00:58:52] And he's like, that's us.

[00:58:53] And then he sees the kid walk out and like looking around like he's lost.

[00:58:58] And so Ian gets the last four letters from the kid, which are stow and pass and stow are the one who cast the Liberty Bell.

[00:59:07] So while all of this is going on, Riley goes to the shop.

[00:59:13] Ian is Googling pass and stow.

[00:59:16] So Google did exist or web browsing.

[00:59:19] I mean, it wasn't Google, but yeah, it did.

[00:59:21] So this is like where your logic is like completely off point.

[00:59:25] Like, I don't get it.

[00:59:26] Like, why not just do that?

[00:59:28] Yeah.

[00:59:28] But I love this part because this is where this is where like not only Riley like actually shows his worth here, you know, his knowledge, but it's the most ridiculous thing for a cashier to hand someone back a hundred dollar bill.

[00:59:42] Yeah.

[00:59:43] Hold my watch.

[00:59:45] What?

[00:59:45] Do you want to get fired?

[00:59:46] They will fire you.

[00:59:48] I did not even notice that.

[00:59:50] This whole scene, I was just like, this is stupid.

[00:59:53] Okay.

[00:59:55] What they realize is that it's they're looking for Independence Hall where the Liberty Bell was prior to it cracking.

[01:00:07] And so they're looking for clues.

[01:00:11] And so on the back of a hundred dollar bill, there was this relief done of Independence Hall by a friend of Benjamin Franklin's.

[01:00:22] And on the bell tower is a clock with a time and it's 2 22.

[01:00:27] And then they're like, oh, shoot, it's after 2 22.

[01:00:30] Darn.

[01:00:31] And then Riley's like, oh, oh, I know why we can still go today.

[01:00:37] Don't you want to ask me?

[01:00:38] Yeah, it's not too late.

[01:00:39] It's not too late.

[01:00:40] And he's like, this is it's he's very excited.

[01:00:43] This his character is excited because this is the first time from a historical standpoint, he's beaten these two nerds over here.

[01:00:52] So he's very excited about this.

[01:00:55] I was actually excited to see him do it, too.

[01:00:57] I was like, oh, Riley.

[01:00:59] Yeah, you tell them.

[01:00:59] That's right.

[01:01:00] You knew that.

[01:01:03] And so it's because daylight savings time didn't take place until World War One, where that fact is now stored in my brain forever.

[01:01:12] I'll lose it by tomorrow.

[01:01:17] National treasure just be teaching you things, Danielle.

[01:01:21] Liberty Bell is cast by pass and stout.

[01:01:24] I'll never forget that shit.

[01:01:26] Gone today.

[01:01:28] Never here tomorrow.

[01:01:31] We run over to Independence Hall.

[01:01:35] Well, not Berry Farms, but yeah.

[01:01:37] Yes, correct.

[01:01:38] Yes, exactly.

[01:01:39] So, yes, they did not get to run all over the roof of the actual Independence Hall.

[01:01:45] There is an exact replica at Knott's Berry Farms in Utah, I believe.

[01:01:51] And that's where they filmed that scene.

[01:01:55] I think it's like some eccentric millionaire built replica because.

[01:02:01] I'm sure it was.

[01:02:02] Yeah.

[01:02:02] Mr. Knott's, why not waste my money this way?

[01:02:07] Yeah.

[01:02:08] Or he said, I need to build this so they can come.

[01:02:13] I'm sorry.

[01:02:14] I can't hear Not Berry Farm without thinking of the movie Music and Lyrics.

[01:02:19] Oh.

[01:02:20] You know, it's like Not Berry Cancel.

[01:02:22] He's like, Not Berry Cancel?

[01:02:27] I don't know.

[01:02:28] It's just, every time I hear this, I just think of Hugh Grant.

[01:02:32] So, no.

[01:02:32] I love him.

[01:02:34] Sorry, Not Berry Farm is in Southern California.

[01:02:39] They all stand in the bell tower and wait till 2.22.

[01:02:43] And then the steeple points to kind of like a wall of bricks on the roof.

[01:02:52] And so, I don't know how no one saw him climbing all over like this very historic building.

[01:02:59] But Ben gets down there.

[01:03:01] There is a brick with a Freemason symbol on it that's hollow.

[01:03:04] And it has these spectacles in it.

[01:03:08] The ones that my background are.

[01:03:10] They look like old school 3D glasses.

[01:03:13] I'm going to get it real.

[01:03:14] 3D glasses, yeah.

[01:03:15] Yeah, keep it real.

[01:03:16] One red, one blue.

[01:03:17] So, we're about to go see a Marvel movie.

[01:03:22] Something.

[01:03:22] Something.

[01:03:23] It's.

[01:03:24] So, they just.

[01:03:27] Exactly.

[01:03:28] So, they decide.

[01:03:30] They're not going to just.

[01:03:31] They're not going to get far away from Independence Hall.

[01:03:35] To kind of figure out what the next clue is.

[01:03:37] They're just going to hop like a velvet rope.

[01:03:40] And go where they're not supposed to.

[01:03:43] And roll it out.

[01:03:45] In Independence Hall.

[01:03:47] And figure that shit out there.

[01:03:48] So, he puts on the glasses.

[01:03:50] He sees here at the wall.

[01:03:52] Here is spelled with two E's.

[01:03:54] And then Ian and his goons show up.

[01:03:58] And so.

[01:04:00] Ben says.

[01:04:02] We don't want him to have the declaration.

[01:04:04] We don't want him to have the glasses.

[01:04:06] But we definitely don't want him to have it together.

[01:04:08] So, we're going to separate the lock from the key.

[01:04:11] And so.

[01:04:12] Check, you just got real excited.

[01:04:13] If you didn't see this on video.

[01:04:15] She got super duper excited just now.

[01:04:18] You know.

[01:04:21] So, he.

[01:04:22] He takes the empty.

[01:04:25] Leather tube.

[01:04:26] With him.

[01:04:27] And the glasses.

[01:04:29] And then Riley.

[01:04:31] And Abigail.

[01:04:32] Take the metal insert tube.

[01:04:34] And they separate.

[01:04:35] And go two separate ways.

[01:04:37] So.

[01:04:38] Ben's being chased by one.

[01:04:40] A couple of guys.

[01:04:41] And Riley.

[01:04:43] And Abigail.

[01:04:44] Are being chased by.

[01:04:46] Another.

[01:04:48] And then this is where.

[01:04:49] She hides, right?

[01:04:50] Yes.

[01:04:51] So, they go into like this.

[01:04:52] Like market.

[01:04:55] And she jumps behind the counter.

[01:04:57] And the lady was like.

[01:04:58] Unless you're a steak.

[01:04:59] You shouldn't be behind here.

[01:05:01] And she's like.

[01:05:03] I'm hiding from my ex-husband.

[01:05:05] And the lady like looks at the angry bald man.

[01:05:07] Is like.

[01:05:08] You can stay as long as you want.

[01:05:10] And because not only did the lady let her hide there.

[01:05:13] The guy kind of comes up to the counter.

[01:05:15] He's looking around.

[01:05:16] And she's like.

[01:05:16] Can I help you?

[01:05:18] Exactly.

[01:05:19] That's right.

[01:05:19] Yeah.

[01:05:23] Awesome.

[01:05:23] I'm sorry.

[01:05:24] She says.

[01:05:25] Do you want something?

[01:05:27] And he goes.

[01:05:28] I like that better.

[01:05:29] He tells her.

[01:05:30] Shut up.

[01:05:31] And then she turns.

[01:05:32] Like after he like stomps away.

[01:05:33] She's like.

[01:05:34] I can see why you left him.

[01:05:37] I'm like.

[01:05:38] This is the best character in this whole damn movie.

[01:05:40] A whole damn movie.

[01:05:41] Yeah.

[01:05:43] You know what happened?

[01:05:45] You know why I had a problem with this movie?

[01:05:47] Temple.

[01:05:48] When we were going to watch it.

[01:05:49] I was super stoked.

[01:05:51] Do you know why?

[01:05:52] Because I thought we were watching National Treasure 2.

[01:05:56] Oh.

[01:05:56] In Mount Rushmore.

[01:05:57] Oh yeah.

[01:05:58] I thought the entire plot from National Treasure 2.

[01:06:01] Was National Treasure 1.

[01:06:03] Oh no.

[01:06:03] And so I was like.

[01:06:04] Yes.

[01:06:05] This is my favorite.

[01:06:07] Favorite one.

[01:06:08] And I was like.

[01:06:08] Oh shit.

[01:06:09] That's the second one.

[01:06:12] So.

[01:06:12] You were hyped for no reason.

[01:06:14] No damn reason.

[01:06:15] I said.

[01:06:16] When is mama coming?

[01:06:18] Where's the queen's desk?

[01:06:21] None of that shit happened.

[01:06:22] Isn't his mom played by like Helen Mirren?

[01:06:24] Yes.

[01:06:25] It is.

[01:06:26] Helen Mirren and John Voight as your parents.

[01:06:29] Yes please.

[01:06:30] No please.

[01:06:31] I don't want John Voight.

[01:06:33] Helen Mirren.

[01:06:34] Yes.

[01:06:34] Well no.

[01:06:35] I just mean like.

[01:06:36] As far as like their presence.

[01:06:38] Oh man.

[01:06:38] Yeah.

[01:06:39] That's crazy.

[01:06:39] Yeah.

[01:06:40] So.

[01:06:41] No.

[01:06:41] But you're right.

[01:06:42] I think Angelina Jolie told us that.

[01:06:44] That's not a good idea.

[01:06:45] A long time ago.

[01:06:45] She told us.

[01:06:47] Yes.

[01:06:47] Not a good idea.

[01:06:48] So.

[01:06:49] So.

[01:06:50] Now Abigail.

[01:06:51] Trips and falls.

[01:06:53] Like.

[01:06:53] Chocks the declaration of independence into the street.

[01:06:57] And we're watching cars like drive over to over it.

[01:07:00] But straddling it.

[01:07:01] So they're not squashing it.

[01:07:03] And then.

[01:07:04] So then.

[01:07:05] Do they get caught too?

[01:07:07] So.

[01:07:08] Riley and Abigail do not get caught.

[01:07:11] They are able to get the declaration and get away.

[01:07:14] Okay.

[01:07:15] But.

[01:07:16] And they call Ben.

[01:07:18] And they're like.

[01:07:19] Hey.

[01:07:19] We're good.

[01:07:21] And he's like.

[01:07:21] Meet me at the car.

[01:07:22] But then they see.

[01:07:24] That the FBI.

[01:07:25] Are at the car.

[01:07:27] So Ben gets arrested.

[01:07:29] This is when they have the very civil chat.

[01:07:31] With Ben in handcuffs.

[01:07:33] Where they're like.

[01:07:34] We just need to arrest someone.

[01:07:36] So Ben's like.

[01:07:36] I got you.

[01:07:38] Let's come up with a plan.

[01:07:40] I was waiting for him to be like waterboarded or something.

[01:07:42] Yeah.

[01:07:44] Just like all this talking has happened.

[01:07:46] I was like.

[01:07:46] Oh he's going to get it now.

[01:07:48] But the FBI is like.

[01:07:50] So kind citizen of America.

[01:07:52] Please help us.

[01:07:53] We know you were just trying to do your civic duty.

[01:07:58] Harvey Keitel.

[01:08:00] Like.

[01:08:00] Of all people.

[01:08:02] And he's like.

[01:08:03] So flat in this.

[01:08:04] Yeah.

[01:08:05] This is a paycheck.

[01:08:06] Yeah.

[01:08:07] Yeah.

[01:08:09] He was underutilized.

[01:08:11] Like you have Harvey Keitel.

[01:08:12] And he just like.

[01:08:14] Saunters into a scene.

[01:08:16] Talks to Nicholas Cage for three lines.

[01:08:18] And saunters back out.

[01:08:20] Hey.

[01:08:21] I'm going to do this movie.

[01:08:23] But I only want to do it for a couple of days.

[01:08:25] Yeah.

[01:08:25] Pay me a million dollars.

[01:08:27] Yeah.

[01:08:27] That's where the budget.

[01:08:28] Harvey Keitel.

[01:08:29] You got to do it.

[01:08:30] Let's look at our line items.

[01:08:32] Harvey.

[01:08:32] Harvey Keitel.

[01:08:34] A million dollars.

[01:08:35] One mil.

[01:08:36] Now we're down to 90.

[01:08:38] No problem.

[01:08:39] Well.

[01:08:40] We're less.

[01:08:40] I can't do math.

[01:08:41] Apparently.

[01:08:44] Nine million.

[01:08:47] Math's not math.

[01:08:48] My bad.

[01:08:50] So Ben is telling the FBI everything.

[01:08:53] Start to finish.

[01:08:55] Like Ian's involvement.

[01:08:56] His involvement.

[01:08:58] Abigail chases.

[01:08:59] And he's like.

[01:09:01] I will help you.

[01:09:02] But you need to.

[01:09:04] Like Riley.

[01:09:05] Is out of it.

[01:09:07] And Abigail's out of it.

[01:09:08] And I'll get you Ian.

[01:09:09] Like those are my terms.

[01:09:11] And they're amenable to that.

[01:09:13] Apparently.

[01:09:15] So.

[01:09:15] So let me get this straight.

[01:09:17] White man walks in.

[01:09:19] Steals the declaration of independence.

[01:09:24] Runs away from his daddy's house.

[01:09:26] Leave his daddy to rot.

[01:09:27] In jail.

[01:09:28] And then you catch him.

[01:09:30] And then he says.

[01:09:31] All right.

[01:09:33] Everybody goes free.

[01:09:34] And I get you this other guy.

[01:09:36] Who was trying to steal it.

[01:09:37] But didn't steal it.

[01:09:39] Yeah.

[01:09:40] Make that make sense.

[01:09:41] Yeah.

[01:09:43] Okay.

[01:09:45] Well.

[01:09:45] I think Ian.

[01:09:47] Ian was probably the bigger draw.

[01:09:49] Because I think.

[01:09:50] Like when he was talking about.

[01:09:52] Because Ian was funding Ben.

[01:09:55] And so I think.

[01:09:56] Right.

[01:09:56] Ian was getting his funds.

[01:09:59] From some shit.

[01:10:00] That was not on the up and up.

[01:10:01] It does not matter.

[01:10:03] Intent versus.

[01:10:05] Actually doing a.

[01:10:06] Committing a crime.

[01:10:07] Are two different things.

[01:10:08] You just needed a body.

[01:10:09] Danielle.

[01:10:11] You just needed a body.

[01:10:11] This don't make sense.

[01:10:14] This don't make sense.

[01:10:16] So while this is going on.

[01:10:18] While we're having this little chat.

[01:10:20] With the FBI.

[01:10:21] Movie terms.

[01:10:22] Ben still has leverage.

[01:10:23] Because they don't have the declaration.

[01:10:25] That's true.

[01:10:27] I feel like.

[01:10:29] That doesn't.

[01:10:29] That doesn't work out in real life.

[01:10:31] Yeah.

[01:10:32] It does not.

[01:10:33] Movie world.

[01:10:34] Yeah.

[01:10:34] Why not?

[01:10:34] And we also have to talk about the fact.

[01:10:36] Of the way that DC is built.

[01:10:39] It is like a circle.

[01:10:40] Right?

[01:10:40] The way that it's.

[01:10:42] But they weren't in DC.

[01:10:45] Originally.

[01:10:45] When they.

[01:10:46] When he stole the declaration.

[01:10:47] Oh yeah.

[01:10:48] So as soon as that thing happened.

[01:10:51] Closed the bridges.

[01:10:53] How did he get out?

[01:10:54] Yeah.

[01:10:55] That's what always perplexed me.

[01:10:57] Because I got lost in DC once.

[01:10:59] And it's a circle.

[01:11:01] I said it was a circle.

[01:11:02] Right?

[01:11:02] I was lost.

[01:11:04] But it's a circle.

[01:11:05] I don't know.

[01:11:07] I've never been.

[01:11:08] Jerry.

[01:11:09] You've got to go.

[01:11:10] It's one of the greatest cities in America.

[01:11:13] And I say this without any sarcasm.

[01:11:17] It was really fun.

[01:11:19] Even though Danielle.

[01:11:21] Said most of the stuff there is fake.

[01:11:24] So anyway.

[01:11:26] No.

[01:11:27] Not everything.

[01:11:28] The narrative behind it is fake.

[01:11:31] Okay.

[01:11:33] So.

[01:11:35] Abigail asked Riley.

[01:11:37] To get in touch with Ian.

[01:11:38] Because she's like.

[01:11:39] We have to have a backup plan.

[01:11:41] And Ian's going to have to be it.

[01:11:43] Because now.

[01:11:45] The FBI has been.

[01:11:48] Right.

[01:11:49] And so the FBI.

[01:11:51] Ian gets in contact with Ben.

[01:11:53] And he's like.

[01:11:54] I'm going to trade you the declaration.

[01:11:57] But you need to tell me everything.

[01:11:59] Essentially.

[01:12:00] And so.

[01:12:01] Because I think deep down.

[01:12:02] Ian does.

[01:12:04] Kind of respect.

[01:12:05] That it's the declaration of independence.

[01:12:07] Like he's willing to sacrifice it if need be.

[01:12:10] But he's willing to give it back to Ben.

[01:12:13] As a bargaining chip too.

[01:12:16] I don't know if I buy that.

[01:12:17] He doesn't respect that shit.

[01:12:18] Yeah.

[01:12:19] He just wants his money.

[01:12:21] I think he just wants the money.

[01:12:22] He doesn't care.

[01:12:23] He would have burned that.

[01:12:24] But he knows that it means a lot to Ben.

[01:12:26] I think he will.

[01:12:27] He'd rather play off of that.

[01:12:29] He doesn't.

[01:12:30] He.

[01:12:30] The US of A.

[01:12:32] He don't care.

[01:12:33] He would have burned that shit.

[01:12:34] If he thought it was going to get him more money.

[01:12:37] That was it.

[01:12:37] He wasn't in it for the heart.

[01:12:39] That's.

[01:12:40] I think honestly.

[01:12:41] That's the.

[01:12:42] The root of the differences between these two characters.

[01:12:46] Is because.

[01:12:48] At Ben's core.

[01:12:49] It's the history.

[01:12:50] It's his family's legacy.

[01:12:52] And he cares about the actual documents.

[01:12:55] And.

[01:12:56] Right.

[01:12:56] This.

[01:12:57] This history that's been passed down.

[01:13:00] Now the other guy is like.

[01:13:01] Ian's like.

[01:13:03] Money.

[01:13:04] That's it.

[01:13:04] Like he does not respect any of it.

[01:13:07] He could care less.

[01:13:08] He has shown zero respect for any of this stuff.

[01:13:12] Because even in the way that he went to go steal it in the first place.

[01:13:15] But guns blazing.

[01:13:16] Not giving a shit.

[01:13:18] That's true.

[01:13:19] You know.

[01:13:19] So.

[01:13:20] Yep.

[01:13:21] So we.

[01:13:24] Now the FBI has like a sting where Ben's going to go and me.

[01:13:29] Go be Ian.

[01:13:30] And on top of the intrepid in New York.

[01:13:33] So.

[01:13:34] They.

[01:13:35] They rendezvous.

[01:13:37] On the top deck of the intrepid.

[01:13:40] And Ben's like.

[01:13:42] I'm gonna.

[01:13:44] I'm gonna see myself out.

[01:13:46] And just like.

[01:13:47] Dives into the water.

[01:13:48] There is some exposition earlier.

[01:13:50] About how he was like an expert diver.

[01:13:53] And things like that.

[01:13:54] So.

[01:13:54] Seems like he's comfortable in those type of situations.

[01:13:58] But then he gets into the water.

[01:14:00] And.

[01:14:01] Ian's.

[01:14:02] Like cronies are there.

[01:14:04] With like.

[01:14:05] An air tank and stuff.

[01:14:06] To rescue him.

[01:14:08] This never really made.

[01:14:10] Sense to me.

[01:14:11] No.

[01:14:12] It's just a plan to stash him.

[01:14:13] That's really all it is.

[01:14:14] Just to get him away from the FBI guys.

[01:14:16] That's true.

[01:14:17] And.

[01:14:18] And.

[01:14:18] You know.

[01:14:19] Ian.

[01:14:19] Who's not really calling the shots.

[01:14:20] We find out that it's all a plan from Diane Kruger.

[01:14:24] Yes.

[01:14:24] I don't know why.

[01:14:25] I can't.

[01:14:25] Abigail.

[01:14:26] I can't remember her name.

[01:14:28] We find out.

[01:14:29] It's all like her doing.

[01:14:30] But it's basically just a way of getting Ben away from the FBI guys.

[01:14:33] And back on the trail.

[01:14:35] And Danielle.

[01:14:37] Where did he jump?

[01:14:39] Why does motherfucker the dirty ass Hudson?

[01:14:43] I'm like.

[01:14:43] Oh.

[01:14:44] Danielle's going to have an opinion about this.

[01:14:46] It's so dirty.

[01:14:47] Which they call out.

[01:14:49] Because the FBI is like.

[01:14:50] Can you see him?

[01:14:51] And they're like.

[01:14:52] It's the Hudson.

[01:14:53] You can't see anything.

[01:14:55] I'm like.

[01:14:55] I'm sure you saw baby's diapers.

[01:14:57] Floating.

[01:14:57] And you couldn't pay me enough money.

[01:15:00] To go into that fucking water.

[01:15:02] All the treasures for centuries.

[01:15:06] No.

[01:15:07] For millennia.

[01:15:08] I felt this way about the.

[01:15:10] About Hitch as well.

[01:15:11] No.

[01:15:14] Wanted to throw up when I saw that.

[01:15:16] So Ian.

[01:15:18] So Ian.

[01:15:19] All of.

[01:15:20] Everything they've collected thus far.

[01:15:22] Over to Ben.

[01:15:23] And.

[01:15:24] Including Abigail and Riley.

[01:15:25] Yes.

[01:15:26] Yes.

[01:15:28] And so.

[01:15:29] He.

[01:15:30] The.

[01:15:31] Um.

[01:15:32] And.

[01:15:33] While Ben is talking to the FBI agents.

[01:15:35] There's an agent sitting there.

[01:15:37] Absent.

[01:15:38] Uh.

[01:15:38] Absent mindedly.

[01:15:39] Playing with this.

[01:15:40] The specs.

[01:15:41] And Ben's noticing.

[01:15:43] As they lift a lens.

[01:15:45] Like.

[01:15:45] The paper changes.

[01:15:46] So he's like.

[01:15:48] Oh.

[01:15:48] There must be more.

[01:15:49] I.

[01:15:49] I have to play with the lenses.

[01:15:51] And so that's what he does.

[01:15:53] He figures out.

[01:15:54] It's Trinity Church.

[01:15:55] In New York City.

[01:15:57] Um.

[01:15:57] At.

[01:15:58] Wall Street and Broadway.

[01:16:00] Right.

[01:16:01] So.

[01:16:02] Um.

[01:16:04] Now.

[01:16:05] Is when it turns to Indiana Jones.

[01:16:07] Because we have to go in a church.

[01:16:09] And.

[01:16:10] We have to break into a crypt.

[01:16:12] In a crypt.

[01:16:13] Yeah.

[01:16:15] Poor dude's body.

[01:16:16] I know.

[01:16:18] I felt so bad.

[01:16:21] You know.

[01:16:22] And.

[01:16:22] Find a treasure.

[01:16:23] Desecrate some remains.

[01:16:24] It's all.

[01:16:25] Always.

[01:16:25] Always.

[01:16:26] Always.

[01:16:27] And.

[01:16:28] They have dad too.

[01:16:29] He.

[01:16:30] He didn't like not being in charge.

[01:16:32] So he.

[01:16:32] Uh.

[01:16:32] He snagged dad.

[01:16:34] Just.

[01:16:34] Just to be in charge.

[01:16:36] Just to have.

[01:16:37] Another bargaining chip.

[01:16:38] That wasn't on the table.

[01:16:40] And it worked.

[01:16:40] And dad.

[01:16:42] Yeah.

[01:16:43] No.

[01:16:43] I was going to say.

[01:16:44] At this point.

[01:16:45] I would have.

[01:16:45] I feel like Ben.

[01:16:46] Didn't give a shit about his daddy.

[01:16:48] Because clearly.

[01:16:49] Right.

[01:16:49] He led the FBI to his house.

[01:16:51] And dipped.

[01:16:52] And dad.

[01:16:53] The whole time.

[01:16:54] Is like.

[01:16:54] Like.

[01:16:56] He has the.

[01:16:57] Like you have to change the status quo.

[01:16:59] Like.

[01:17:00] You have to have something that he wants.

[01:17:02] And as soon as you lead him to.

[01:17:04] Right now you do.

[01:17:05] Because.

[01:17:06] You are leading him to the treasure.

[01:17:08] Info.

[01:17:08] Right.

[01:17:09] Right.

[01:17:09] As soon as you get to the treasure.

[01:17:12] Like status quo changes.

[01:17:14] And yeah.

[01:17:15] He.

[01:17:17] He's going to kill it.

[01:17:18] He's going to kill all of us.

[01:17:20] And so dad's like.

[01:17:21] We have to figure out a way to change the status quo.

[01:17:23] He said status quo.

[01:17:25] Like eight times.

[01:17:26] In the period of like three minutes.

[01:17:28] That's where the million.

[01:17:30] The hundred million dollars were.

[01:17:32] They were like.

[01:17:33] Let's see.

[01:17:34] How much you can get status quo into your lives.

[01:17:38] A million every time.

[01:17:40] A million dollars.

[01:17:41] Every time you can say the word status quo.

[01:17:44] I buy it.

[01:17:46] Yeah.

[01:17:46] It checks out.

[01:17:47] And I love how Ben's like.

[01:17:49] Dad.

[01:17:49] Are you all right?

[01:17:50] And he's like.

[01:17:51] What do you mean am I all right?

[01:17:53] I'm a hostage.

[01:17:56] Dad a day ago was just sitting and watching Wheel of Fortune.

[01:18:00] And eating pizza at home.

[01:18:02] And now he's in Trinity Church in New York.

[01:18:05] As a hostage.

[01:18:06] Going down this janky.

[01:18:09] Janky.

[01:18:10] Old ass.

[01:18:11] Wooden staircase.

[01:18:13] Dumb waiter contraption.

[01:18:15] And I tell you.

[01:18:16] No lie.

[01:18:17] As we recall this movie.

[01:18:20] Guess what I'm thinking.

[01:18:21] Well when they get into the.

[01:18:23] Mount Rushmore.

[01:18:25] What do you know?

[01:18:27] We're still thinking we're getting to Mount Rushmore.

[01:18:31] We're still in part one here.

[01:18:37] She ain't coming Danielle.

[01:18:39] It was like.

[01:18:41] How are we getting from New York?

[01:18:44] To the totals.

[01:18:45] It's the secret tunnel.

[01:18:47] From Trinity Church.

[01:18:50] To Mount Rushmore.

[01:18:51] I don't know why.

[01:18:52] The second movie.

[01:18:54] Has left such a.

[01:18:55] Distinguish.

[01:18:57] Like distinctive.

[01:18:58] Like impression.

[01:18:59] On my brain.

[01:19:02] Well maybe that's why.

[01:19:04] Can we get into Mount Rushmore?

[01:19:06] Maybe we need to like.

[01:19:08] Change.

[01:19:09] Like pivot.

[01:19:10] And National Treasure 2.

[01:19:12] Needs to be your birthday movie.

[01:19:13] Because.

[01:19:14] No.

[01:19:15] It's not.

[01:19:17] No.

[01:19:19] So now we're going down.

[01:19:20] The stairs are falling apart.

[01:19:22] I love how.

[01:19:23] They're like.

[01:19:24] How did people build this?

[01:19:25] And they're like.

[01:19:27] Hey Riley goes.

[01:19:28] The same way they built the pyramids.

[01:19:30] The aliens helped him.

[01:19:31] Yes.

[01:19:32] I love.

[01:19:34] I love.

[01:19:34] Good job Riley.

[01:19:35] I love Riley.

[01:19:36] I know.

[01:19:37] That's one conspiracy theory.

[01:19:38] I don't believe.

[01:19:39] I like to still believe.

[01:19:41] That black people built it.

[01:19:42] I don't care who says what.

[01:19:44] Thank you.

[01:19:45] Bye.

[01:19:47] You're.

[01:19:48] You're probably close to the truth.

[01:19:49] So.

[01:19:52] So.

[01:19:52] So.

[01:19:53] They're going down the staircase.

[01:19:55] It's falling apart.

[01:19:56] As dad puts it.

[01:19:57] It's 200 years of termites and rot.

[01:20:00] And.

[01:20:01] At one point.

[01:20:02] Like.

[01:20:03] Shit's just falling.

[01:20:05] Abigail is falling.

[01:20:07] Ben catches her.

[01:20:08] But the declaration is about to fall too.

[01:20:11] He's on like this swing thing.

[01:20:12] The dumbwaiter is swinging.

[01:20:14] And he's like.

[01:20:16] Trust me.

[01:20:17] He.

[01:20:17] Let's go.

[01:20:18] He doesn't even like.

[01:20:19] Launch her.

[01:20:20] He just.

[01:20:21] Let's go of her.

[01:20:23] She falls onto a platform below.

[01:20:25] While he grabs the decorate.

[01:20:27] Declaration.

[01:20:27] He goes to apologize.

[01:20:29] And she's like.

[01:20:30] Don't worry.

[01:20:30] I would have done the exact same thing.

[01:20:32] Rick would never.

[01:20:33] Rick from the mummy would never.

[01:20:35] Never.

[01:20:36] He was saving Evie.

[01:20:37] And the declaration.

[01:20:39] Yeah.

[01:20:40] And he would have been confident.

[01:20:42] So.

[01:20:42] They get to the bottom.

[01:20:43] And they find the crusader.

[01:20:45] And the grails.

[01:20:46] And they have to choose.

[01:20:48] Wait.

[01:20:48] Okay.

[01:20:49] I forgot what movie we were in.

[01:20:51] Did they choose wisely or poorly?

[01:20:55] Choose poorly.

[01:21:01] Ian just starts turning into an accelerated mummy.

[01:21:04] Yes.

[01:21:06] Spoiler alert.

[01:21:06] This is our nerdiest episode ever.

[01:21:09] So far.

[01:21:10] You're welcome.

[01:21:14] So yes.

[01:21:15] We get to the bottom.

[01:21:16] It's a dead end.

[01:21:18] And.

[01:21:19] And.

[01:21:20] They're like.

[01:21:20] This is it.

[01:21:21] This is it.

[01:21:22] And Ian's like.

[01:21:23] About to shoot.

[01:21:24] Start shooting people.

[01:21:25] Because he's like.

[01:21:25] Y'all are lying to me.

[01:21:27] And.

[01:21:28] Finally dad goes.

[01:21:29] Okay.

[01:21:30] It's the lantern.

[01:21:32] Paul Revere hung a lantern in Boston.

[01:21:36] One.

[01:21:37] Two by land.

[01:21:38] One if by sea.

[01:21:40] You need to go to Boston.

[01:21:42] Blah, blah, blah.

[01:21:42] There's a spiral staircase.

[01:21:44] He's just making shit up.

[01:21:45] And so.

[01:21:46] And what he says.

[01:21:48] Like after they leave.

[01:21:50] Abigail's like.

[01:21:51] It was.

[01:21:52] The British came by sea.

[01:21:53] There should have been two lanterns.

[01:21:55] He's like.

[01:21:55] They just needed a clue.

[01:21:57] Shout out to Wentworth Cheswell.

[01:22:00] The black man who rode with Revere.

[01:22:02] That we never learn about.

[01:22:04] Just another nugget.

[01:22:05] This is what I'm talking about.

[01:22:07] If you thought about.

[01:22:08] Me saying all this shit.

[01:22:09] Throughout this whole episode.

[01:22:10] This is what I'm talking about.

[01:22:12] What was that?

[01:22:13] There was that little girl too.

[01:22:15] That young girl that rode.

[01:22:17] And she actually rode like twice.

[01:22:18] Or twice as far as he did.

[01:22:20] I don't remember her name at the moment.

[01:22:22] But drunk history taught me that.

[01:22:25] Let me look up her name.

[01:22:26] I have to go watch that episode.

[01:22:28] So now Ian is gone.

[01:22:32] He's out of their hair.

[01:22:33] And Riley's like.

[01:22:35] But we're still stuck down here.

[01:22:36] He uses the pipe that Ian had given him.

[01:22:39] And it's kind of like a key he can turn.

[01:22:42] They go into another chamber.

[01:22:43] So they.

[01:22:44] Yeah.

[01:22:45] They press a button.

[01:22:46] Whatever.

[01:22:46] They find the actual treasure.

[01:22:48] It's amazing.

[01:22:50] They light some torches.

[01:22:51] They find their way out.

[01:22:53] Because of course.

[01:22:54] They wouldn't have just dug one way.

[01:22:56] They would have dug them another way out.

[01:22:57] Right.

[01:22:58] And it sets up.

[01:23:00] Like the very next scene is when Ian's going to the church.

[01:23:03] And he gets arrested by Harvey Keitel.

[01:23:05] That's right.

[01:23:06] And Ben is just kind of like in the car.

[01:23:07] Like I got you.

[01:23:10] He's like yeah.

[01:23:11] And Ben's like.

[01:23:13] I told you.

[01:23:14] I'd give you someone to arrest.

[01:23:17] Exactly.

[01:23:17] Like yeah.

[01:23:18] There you go.

[01:23:19] And so like Ben appreciates the historical value of all this treasure.

[01:23:24] Because it is treasure that has been collected for millennia.

[01:23:28] Like it's not millennia.

[01:23:31] Centuries.

[01:23:32] I don't know.

[01:23:32] I don't know time things.

[01:23:34] So it's like.

[01:23:35] So it's like stuff from ancient Egypt.

[01:23:37] It's stuff from the Roman Empire.

[01:23:40] It's stuff from ancient Greece.

[01:23:42] Like it's just.

[01:23:43] It's been compiled.

[01:23:45] Yeah.

[01:23:45] It's stolen.

[01:23:46] Of course.

[01:23:47] These are stolen things.

[01:23:48] And he doesn't understand that.

[01:23:49] And he needs to go back.

[01:23:50] Right.

[01:23:51] Ben.

[01:23:51] Ben says we need to distribute it to all of the museums all over the world.

[01:23:57] And that's where my problem is.

[01:23:58] Because museums as a whole.

[01:24:02] That's not going back to where they came from.

[01:24:04] There are civilizations.

[01:24:06] And people who deserve their history back.

[01:24:09] And what ends up.

[01:24:10] I'm sure happening to these relics.

[01:24:12] They end up going to European.

[01:24:14] And American museums.

[01:24:16] And not back to where they're supposed to.

[01:24:19] And that is one of the reasons.

[01:24:21] Like it's great.

[01:24:22] We learn history and whatnot.

[01:24:24] But like there are cultures.

[01:24:26] That want their shit back.

[01:24:28] And we don't give it to them.

[01:24:31] So.

[01:24:32] And so the world as a collective.

[01:24:37] Had offered.

[01:24:39] To pay.

[01:24:41] Abigail.

[01:24:43] And Ben.

[01:24:43] And Riley.

[01:24:44] 10% of their findings.

[01:24:46] And Ben said it was too much.

[01:24:49] He would only accept 1%.

[01:24:51] And so Riley is complaining.

[01:24:53] So we see now.

[01:24:54] Ben and Abigail live in this like estate.

[01:24:59] Batman's house.

[01:25:00] Yes.

[01:25:01] They live in literal.

[01:25:02] No literally.

[01:25:03] I told you Danielle.

[01:25:05] It's because Ben is Bruce Wayne.

[01:25:08] Not in his.

[01:25:09] Not in his lifetime.

[01:25:12] Maybe his cousin.

[01:25:13] It's his cousin.

[01:25:14] They're cousins.

[01:25:16] So they're in this huge estate.

[01:25:18] Riley pulls up in a Lamborghini.

[01:25:22] I don't know.

[01:25:23] Some sort of nice car.

[01:25:25] A car.

[01:25:25] Right, Jerry?

[01:25:26] Thank you.

[01:25:26] Finally.

[01:25:27] Yeah.

[01:25:28] Look, there's very few cars I know.

[01:25:30] I know the Batmobile.

[01:25:31] Right.

[01:25:31] I know the DeLorean.

[01:25:33] Right.

[01:25:33] I know Kit from Back to the Future.

[01:25:35] Real cars.

[01:25:36] I mean, Kit from Knight Rider.

[01:25:39] Right.

[01:25:39] You know, so it's like, I'm good.

[01:25:41] Yeah.

[01:25:41] I got what I need.

[01:25:42] Man, I was wrong.

[01:25:43] It was not a Lamborghini.

[01:25:45] It was a Ferrari.

[01:25:46] So.

[01:25:46] It's a red car, y'all.

[01:25:48] It is a red car.

[01:25:49] Yeah.

[01:25:50] Riley cannot drive manual transmission.

[01:25:53] He's burning that clutch.

[01:25:54] He's he's stalling the car.

[01:25:58] Um, but he he is complaining that, um, they only got 1%.

[01:26:03] So that puts in perspective how much treasure was actually down there.

[01:26:07] And then.

[01:26:09] We find out in the second one, there's even more treasure we have to find.

[01:26:13] Can't wait for that one.

[01:26:16] But for now, that is national treasure.

[01:26:21] So I found a little girl.

[01:26:25] Her name is Sybil Ludington.

[01:26:26] She was a young woman, woman.

[01:26:29] So maybe she was 16 years old.

[01:26:32] She was young.

[01:26:32] She lived in rural Dutchess County, New York, close to Connecticut border during the American

[01:26:38] Revolution.

[01:26:40] Um, the daughter of a commander in the Dutchess.

[01:26:44] County militia.

[01:26:45] Um, is said to have ridden 40 miles into what is today Connecticut to warn members of her father's

[01:26:53] militia that the British were about to attack their neighborhood.

[01:26:58] Yep.

[01:26:58] That's the one.

[01:26:59] So another, another piece of history that we don't hear.

[01:27:04] Make a movie about her.

[01:27:06] Right.

[01:27:07] Well, let's find out the background first before we invested that.

[01:27:11] I mean, I like history, but I don't want to like, you know what I mean?

[01:27:14] You know what I mean?

[01:27:16] I know what you mean.

[01:27:17] Like if she was a Quaker, I'm good.

[01:27:19] But if not.

[01:27:21] Questionable.

[01:27:23] I don't need another movie.

[01:27:25] You know what I'm saying?

[01:27:26] If y'all know what I'm saying.

[01:27:28] Okay.

[01:27:30] Are there any fun facts that we missed?

[01:27:33] So many.

[01:27:35] So Ben, Patrick, and John Gates were all named after the founding fathers, Benjamin Franklin,

[01:27:40] Patrick Henry, and John Adams.

[01:27:42] Abigail Chase is the combination of Abigail Adams, wife of John and Samuel Chase, a signer

[01:27:47] of the Declaration of Independence, and later an associate justice of the United States Supreme

[01:27:53] Court.

[01:27:54] Well, Danielle, the filmmakers did not plan to make a sequel, but because the first one

[01:28:01] did so well, that's where we get the National Treasure Book of Secrets.

[01:28:07] And sadly, it came out in 2007, so we won't get to do it on the podcast.

[01:28:12] Fuck!

[01:28:14] Oh.

[01:28:15] I'm sorry.

[01:28:16] I mean, you know, you like Kobayashi Maru, just kind of ban it a little bit.

[01:28:21] You'll make it work.

[01:28:23] I'm pissed.

[01:28:25] So you're telling me we don't get to do Mighty Ducks 1, Mighty Ducks 2, and now we don't get

[01:28:32] to do National Treasure 2?

[01:28:33] This is bullshit.

[01:28:35] I am so mad.

[01:28:36] I can't either.

[01:28:38] I'm sorry for your loss.

[01:28:40] This whole time.

[01:28:42] The only thing to get me through is knowing we were going to do a second movie.

[01:28:46] We'll watch it on your birthday, just you and I.

[01:28:50] We don't have to take notes.

[01:28:51] Bonus episode.

[01:28:52] Just do a bonus episode.

[01:28:54] Yeah.

[01:28:55] You'll make it work.

[01:28:58] Okay.

[01:28:59] This is the disappointment of my life.

[01:29:02] You waited to the end of this, didn't you?

[01:29:04] You knew this.

[01:29:05] No, no.

[01:29:05] I was just reading the fun facts and I was like, oh, she's going to be so disappointed.

[01:29:10] Well, it says the sequel was given the green light in 2005.

[01:29:14] I'm like, there's no way they shot it and it came out in 2005.

[01:29:17] So.

[01:29:18] And I put together the notes.

[01:29:20] How did I not put this together?

[01:29:23] You must have just been copying and pasting.

[01:29:25] My brain was trying to prevent me from feeling this trauma.

[01:29:29] Yes.

[01:29:30] It is.

[01:29:30] All right.

[01:29:31] Well, I think, I think we're done with the extras.

[01:29:35] Jerry, before we get into our ratings, why don't you give us your social handles?

[01:29:43] So again, Facebook and Instagram at totally rad Christmas, Twitter at rad Christmas.

[01:29:49] You can also go to link tree slash, you know, totally rad Christmas or totally rad Christmas.com.

[01:29:56] You can get to all that stuff through there.

[01:29:57] And if you go on Facebook, which I know is kind of outdated now, but I do have a group

[01:30:01] there called totally rad Christmas mall and arcade where we just talk anything 80s and

[01:30:07] Christmas related, usually more 80s than Christmas, but that's okay too.

[01:30:12] And if you have some hot takes, I have trash our American government for a good hour.

[01:30:19] Or in some time, you have some feelings about that.

[01:30:24] Keep that to yourself.

[01:30:25] But if you have feelings about the movie, then hit us up at no more late fees on Instagram,

[01:30:31] Facebook, TikTok, Twitter, and YouTube.

[01:30:33] Let's get into the present day ratings.

[01:30:36] We'll start with you, Jerry.

[01:30:37] I still really like it.

[01:30:38] Yeah.

[01:30:39] But I think it might be more of like a two day rental.

[01:30:43] Wow.

[01:30:44] Okay.

[01:30:45] Jackie.

[01:30:45] Jackie.

[01:30:47] Um, I will watch this movie any chance I get.

[01:30:50] Uh, and I don't own it when, uh, someone in my family plan owns it.

[01:30:56] So I didn't have to buy it, but, um, I will always and forever watch national treasure.

[01:31:01] Anytime it's on.

[01:31:02] There was one fourth of July.

[01:31:04] It was like on TBS.

[01:31:06] And it was about the third, like, cause you know, they just start the movie over.

[01:31:11] Yeah.

[01:31:11] And mom's like, she's like, Oh, I've never seen national treasure too.

[01:31:18] And we're like, mom, it's the same movie.

[01:31:21] I'm already gone.

[01:31:22] Oh no.

[01:31:23] Like six hours.

[01:31:23] You felt your disappointment, Danielle.

[01:31:26] Miss Terry, I understand.

[01:31:30] So we will watch it on repeat.

[01:31:33] Apparently.

[01:31:34] If given the opportunity.

[01:31:38] So that's a.

[01:31:40] Goodbye.

[01:31:41] Goodbye.

[01:31:42] Yeah.

[01:31:43] Oh, okay.

[01:31:46] Well.

[01:31:48] Nostalgia plays a really big factor in this movie, but now that I very much understand that

[01:31:54] this is not national treasure too, I'm probably going to go with Jerry and say a two day rental

[01:32:01] only because it's not national treasure too.

[01:32:05] Okay.

[01:32:05] I'm out.

[01:32:09] She chose poorly.

[01:32:13] And then you can be featured on a future episode.

[01:32:16] And if you have any feedback, want to suggest future movies, what you liked and disliked,

[01:32:21] give us corrections, blockbuster, video stories, your favorite movements, move favorite moments

[01:32:26] from the pod.

[01:32:27] You can hit us up at our quick drop nine zero nine six zero one and MLF nine zero nine six

[01:32:32] zero one six six five three.

[01:32:34] And then you can be featured on a future episode.

[01:32:37] And stay tuned for next week as we cover Pokemon, the first movie.

[01:32:43] And as always be kind and rewind.